As he sighed out that last word he recollected. Perhaps at that moment
Roderick Pym was dead, his revenge had cost him his life; for the count
would be a dangerous antagonist, he was a skilled swordsman and a dead
shot.
“How, when do they fight?” he asked breathlessly, with the instinct to
stay that duel at any cost.
“Fight!” she spoke almost indignantly. “Do you think I would let the
good count kill himself for me—even for _you_?” Tears stood in her eyes.
“I knelt and prayed him,” she said. “I begged him, but he would not hear
me. He said: ‘Would you have me be a coward?’ Then at last he said to
me: ‘If you will promise me that to-morrow you will go home to Spain
with the prince, and will never see or speak to _him_ again, I too will
go with you, and will sacrifice my _honneur_.’” She paused and hung her
head. “So, as I have promised, I have come to say good-bye,” she
faltered.
Yes; he had known this all along, he felt he had. This was the end—the
end of a promised passionate joy—the end of delights of eye and ear—of
heart, soul, mind, body—all!
“Yes,” he said, meekly bowing his head, “I understand. We part; it is
all over for ever.”
“Oh no!” she cried, with sudden life, and her face was alight with love
and hope, “only for here! You know—who should know better than you?—how
short is this life, you who always see the dead and dying! Is it death,
that which we call death?” she asked him, passionately. “Do you think
it? Do you not rather think that _this_ is dying, this living in a place
where you must not love, where people hate and torture each other, and
happiness cannot be, for no one will let another one be happy?”
He went to her and took her slender, cold hands in his—for the last
time.
“It does not matter,” he said, bitterly, yet feeling, with a strange
joy, that this sacrifice of love ennobled their love, raised it from a
common thing to divinity. “No one can separate us after death, if God
wills us to be soul to soul—one for ever.”
A strange expression flitted across her face. For one instant it seemed
to him that this was not Mercedes, but Lilia. Then came the memory of
that awful death-bed, when Lilia defied the will of her Creator, and
would have forced him, her husband, to die with her, and he contrasted
that hour of rebellion with this hour of humble renunciation.
“This is _her soul_,” he thought, in mingled awe and gratitude.
“Roderick would have caused our misery; instead, he has saved us from an
evil life together for here, in this painful world, to be united in
eternity.”
This was his actual death, he felt, as he silently gazed into her eyes,
this parting. Physical death, after this, would be nothing—would,
indeed, be welcome.
For a moment he thought to take her, just this once, into his arms: to
let her heart beat against his breast, to feel her lips upon his mouth;
but before the thought was really born in his mind he killed it and
flung it from him.
“Risk eternity for a moment?” he said to himself. “No!”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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