New York (N.Y.) -- Fiction; Romans à clef; Spouses -- Fiction; Women novelists -- Fiction
But he was not frightened by New York. He knew that this city, of which
he was an integral part because he had been born of the stock that had
settled it--this city whose bold new growth had been conceived in the
brains of a body of men like himself--was a cruel city and would cast
him out if he lagged; but he was sure that he would not lag and that he
and the city understood each other. He gave a positively affectionate
glance from the window and said, under his breath, “The poor old town!
The poor bastard!” I knew that he thought us the monsters who did not
understand. And yet, Eva had hurt him through the medium of every brick
in every great new structure.
Through the smoke of my cigarette, I studied him. By his attitude
towards what Eva had done he was lying. With him, I fancied,
nervousness took the form of an inability to do any creative work
at all. But in what he next said he went back to our interchange of
remarks on the storming of the fortress by the authors. “You people
who come into New York are so marvellous! Such energy! Such apparent
ignorance that you could possibly fail to conquer! It’s amazing. I’ve
noticed about Eva that she can and does turn on to her work the full
force of her storming rages--I don’t mean that in the least the way
it sounds, however; but she does tear around the house and bemoan
herself--well, then,” he pushed on, now thoroughly involved and, I
saw, desperately taking the way out of telling all, “I remember once
when she had asked me to read proof sheets to her, and she was cutting
up over quite minor mistakes, I assure you--saying that the printers
had tampered with her words, and appealing to me in the most agonized
way to know if I hadn’t an ear--and the telephone rang in that awfully
annoying way it has, off and on, off and on; and she simply screamed to
the maid to tell Winnie Conant that she was out--to tell her she was
dead--to tell her anything. And, the point is, she gets ahead with her
work in, and as a direct result of, her emotional upsets. Sometimes I’m
appalled by her vital energy. But when it comes to turning some of that
energy into the minutiæ of living she’s horrified at the interruption.
She doesn’t,” he concluded helplessly, “open her mail for weeks at a
time.” He appeared to look upon this as one of the most inscrutable
things about his wife.
I asked lazily: “Why should she? You’ve just said that you’re
constantly surprised at the way in which her nervous force is made to
serve the needs of her work. Why try to reform her? She knows what
she’s about.”
He stared. “But it isn’t I who is up to reforming! She’s putting her
shoulder to the wheel of changing me!”
I said to myself: “We’re getting at it!” I asked aloud: “What can you
mean?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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