New York (N.Y.) -- Fiction; Romans à clef; Spouses -- Fiction; Women novelists -- Fiction
We exchanged a long look, at the end of which I told him,
commiseratingly trying to get his mind off his anxiety, that which I
had intended using as a cudgel to bruise him. “I got the chance to
see it,” I flung myself into it; “and now I’d give much if I hadn’t.
We crowded into a slit of a place, and peeked through a large pane of
glass let into the wall.”
He asked patiently in what wall the pane of glass was. “Don’t make it
sound like Alice and the looking-glass, for I don’t feel whimsical.”
I acknowledged to a corresponding lack of whimsy. “It was the
trying-out of applicants for the job of radio announcer. We looked
through the pane of glass as they admitted them one by one, like those
hogs that go sliding down a chute at a slaughter house. Only the hogs
don’t realize. And I assure you, Nicholas, that those poor wretches
took every conceivable test of their courage. I don’t doubt but that
they were hungry. The people on the street corners, selling apples,
have made us all hunger-conscious.” I attacked my cocktail with thirst
engendered by the hunger-consciousness.
“You have the rapt look of the literary sleep-walker,” he stated. He
had seen the look on various faces, and I judged by his accent that he
did not like it. He glanced at his watch, and frowned.
“Listen, Nicholas?” I urged. “Do listen? Behind the pane of glass we
were like fish in an aquarium. You know how fish goggle out at humanity
filing past their tank? We goggled.” The candidates for the one vacant
job were creatures outside the world of the fish in the tank. The fish
saw them, through the pane of glass, and heard not a word from them.
The voices booming at intervals through the loud speaker above the
control board beside us might have come from another dimension. Young
men, middle-aged men, blustering men and uncertain men, strode past the
pane of glass to their salvation or their doom. It had been a motley
lot, I reported to Nicholas. There had been a clergyman, an old man.
He interrupted: “Are you trying to drag me in spirit to the pane of
glass?”
“It wouldn’t hurt you,” I retorted. I wondered what detained Eva.
Looking at the heaps of apples spotting the streets with red, he might
feel that all was well and that Christmas was hot on the heels of a
town gone mad with apprehension. He was uneasy, but his uneasiness was
on account of Eva’s delay in getting home for the security of the night.
Again he looked at his watch. “Dinah, I must interrupt to say----”
But I rushed along. “Would you believe the cruelty of it? They gave
them, as the ‘humorous test,’ that ghastly thing about the man worth
while is the man who can smile when everything goes dead wrong! Are you
listening to what I’m telling you?”
He listened. But he listened for the sound of a key in the lock.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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