Forth he came, boiling and bursting, crossed the stile, and dropped
down on the tree-stump, unable to get any farther. The very fact of
the correspondence being carried on clandestinely made it more cruel
for him. With his bitter indignation mingled a great deal of despair.
In that one miserable moment he began to see that he might indeed lose
Rosaline. To lose her would have been anguish unspeakable; but to see
another gain her was simply torment--and that other the detested
gentleman, Frank Raynor. Blase Pellet had not a very clear idea of
social distinctions, and he saw no particular incongruity in Frank's
making her his wife.
"I've kept quiet as yet about that past night's work;" said Mr. Pellet
to himself, "but I'll speak now. I kept quiet for her sake, knowing
what pain it would bring her; not for his; and because----"
"Well, any way," he resumed, after the long pause which succeeded his
sudden break-off, "I must feel my way in it. If I could only drive him
away from Cornwall for good, that would be enough; and then I'd draw
in again. I heard him tell old Float that he meant to be off to London
soon and settle there: let him go, and leave me and Rose and these
parts alone. I'll help to start him there; and when he's gone I'll
keep silent again. But now--how much will it be safe to say?--and
_what_ can I say?--and how can I set about it?"
Leaning forward, his hands placed on his knees, pressing them almost
to pain, his eyes fixed on the opposite hedge, he went on with his
thoughts. Blase Pellet was of an extremely concentrative nature: he
could revolve and debate doubts and difficulties in his own mind,
until he saw his way to bringing them out straight in the end, just as
patiently and successfully as a Cambridge student will work out a
problem in mathematics. But the difficulty Blase was trying to solve
now was not an easy one.
"I _can't_ say I saw it," debated he. "I can't say I heard it. If I
did, people would ask five hundred questions as to where I was, and
how it came about, and why I did not give the alarm--and I might have
to tell all. I don't care to do that. I won't do it, unless I'm
forced. Let him go away and leave her alone hereafter, and he shall
get off scot-free for me. If I told of him, I should have to tell of
her--that she was present--and she wouldn't like it; neither should I,
for I'd be sorry to bring pain and exposure on her. She ought to have
denounced him at the time--and she was a regular simpleton for not
doing it: but still it would not be pleasant for me to be the one to
complain that she was there and witnessed it all. No, no: I may not
say I know _that_: I dare not say I was a witness myself. I must find
some other way."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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