There is another Ordinary, to which your London Vsurer, your stale Batchilor, and your thrifty Atturney do resort: the price three pence: the roomes as full of company as a Iaile, and indeed diuided into seuerall wards, like the beds of an Hospital. The complement betweene these is not much, their words few: for the belly hath no eares: euery mans eie heere is vpon the other mans trencher, to note whether his fellow lurch him, or no: if they chaunce to discourse, it is of nothing but of _Statutes_, _Bonds_, / _Recognizances_, _Fines_, _Recoueries_, _Audits_, _Rents_, _Subsidies_, _Surties_, _Inclosures_, Liueries, _Inditements_, _Outlaries_, _Feoffments_, _Iudgments_, _Commissions_, _Bankerouts_, _Amercements_, and of such horrible matter, that when a Lifetenant dines with his punck in the next roome, he thinkes verily the men are coniuring. I can find nothing at this Ordinary worthy the sitting downe for: therefore the cloth shall be taken away, and those that are thought good enough to be guests heere, shall be too base to bee waiters at your Grand Ordinary; at which your Gallant tastes these commodities. He shall fare wel, enioy good company, receiue all the newes ere the post can deliuer his packet, be perfect where the best bawdy-houses stand, proclaime his good clothes, know this man to drinke well, that to feed grosly, the other to swaggar roughly: he shall, if hee be minded to trauell, put out money vpon his returne, and haue hands enough to receiue it vpon any termes of repaiment: And no question, if he be poore, he shall now and then light vpon some _Gull_ or other, whom he may skelder (after the gentile fashion) of mony: By this time the parings of Fruit and Cheese are in the voyder, Cards and dice lie stinking in the fire, the guests are all vp, the guilt rapiers ready to be hangd, the French Lackquey, and Irish Footeboy, shrugging at the doores, with their masters hobby-horses, to ride to the new play: thats the _Randeuous_; thither they are gallopt in post. Let vs take a paire of Oares, and now lustily after them. CHAPTER VI How a Gallant should behaue himself in a Play-house. THE theater is your Poets Royal Exchange, vpon which their Muses (that are now turnd to Merchants) meeting, barter away that light commodity of words for a lighter ware then words, _Plaudites_, and the _breath_ of the great _Beast_; which (like the threatnings of two Cowards) vanish all into air. _Plaiers_ and their _Factors_, who put away the stuffe, and make the best of it they possibly can (as indeed tis their parts so to doe), your / Gallant, your Courtier, and your Capten, had wont to be the soundest paymaisters; and I thinke are still the surest chapmen: and these, by meanes that their heades are well stockt, deale vp[=o] this comical freight by the grosse: when your _Groundling_, and _gallery-Commoner_ buyes his sport by the penny, and, like a _Hagler_, is glad to vtter it againe by retailing.