_Tom Mizen._ You must know, Mr. Bull, having, as it were, lashed myself to a love of my King and Country, and hearing the land lubber at the bar was about to bring over his Cock boats; I thought myself, in duty bounden, to see what sort of game he was after; so, rigging out my little skiff the Buxom Kitty, I clapped a few pounders aboard, with an allowance of grog, and set sail; when I got near Bull-hog-ney--I think they call it so in their palaver--but I never can think of their outlandish palaver, not I--howsomdever I soon spied a little gun boat or two, and on board one of them I saw a little pale-faced olive-coloured man in a large cocked hat, taking measure of the sides: may I never set sail again, said I, if that is not little Boney--so I made no more ado, but got ready my cordage and grappling irons, and after one broadside, towed the little gentleman into Brighton. _John Bull._ Bravo, Mister Mizen--now let us hear what Mynheer Dutchman has to say. _Dutchman._ Indeed, Mynheer Bool, I have nothing to say in his favour--he has robbed me of my liberty, my money, and everything that is dear to me. _Italian._ I am precisely in the same position. _Swiss._ And I. _The Pope._ I once had a voice in the senate, but he has totally abridged my power. _Hanoverian, &c._ We are one and all tired of his tyrannical usurpation. _John Bull._ Then it appears to me no one will speak in his favour. _From the Court._ Not one. _John Bull._ Well then--what has the prisoner to say in his own defence? _Buonaparte._ I am a man of few words, and leave my defence, entirely to my counsel. _The Devil, as Counsellor for the Prisoner._ Mr. Bull, and Gentlemen of the Jury, I blush for the first time in my life; it is well known I am the father of lies and mischief, and have had the prisoner at the bar a considerable time in training, but he really goes so much beyond my abilities, that I entirely give up to the discretion of the Jury. _John Bull._ I shall very briefly, gentlemen, sum up the evidence; you have heard a long and serious detail of the prisoner’s cruelties in different parts of the world. The conduct of our worthy countryman, Tom Mizen, you must all admire; you perceive there is not one person to speak in his favour; and even his old counsel the Devil will have nothing to do with him--I therefore leave him to your verdict. The Jury, without leaving the Court, pronounced the prisoner _Guilty_. John Bull then passed sentence, as follows: