The lad was overjoyed to get this stick--so away he went with it to the
inn, and as soon as the publican, appeared, “Up stick and bang him!” was
his cry. At the word the cudgel flew from his hand and battered the
old publican on the back, rapped his head, bruised his arms tickled his
ribs, till he fell groaning on the floor; still the stick belaboured
the prostrate man, nor would Jack call it off till he had got back the
stolen ass and table. Then he galloped home on the ass, with the table
on his shoulders, and the stick in his hand. When he arrived there he
found his father was dead, so he brought his ass into the stable, and
pulled its ears till he had filled the manger with money.
It was soon known through the town that Jack had returned rolling in
wealth, and accordingly all the girls in the place set their caps at
him. “Now,” said Jack, “I shall marry the richest lass in the place; so
tomorrow do you all come in front of my house with your money in your
aprons.”
Next morning the street was full of girls with aprons held out, and gold
and silver in them; but Jack's own sweetheart was among them, and she
had neither gold nor silver, nought but two copper pennies, that was all
she had.
“Stand aside, lass;” said Jack to her, speaking roughly. “Thou hast no
silver nor gold--stand off from the rest.” She obeyed, and the tears ran
down her cheeks, and filled her apron with diamonds.
“Up stick and bang them!” exclaimed Jack; whereupon the cudgel leaped
up, and running along the line of girls, knocked them all on the heads
and left them senseless on the pavement. Jack took all their money and
poured it into his truelove's lap. “Now, lass,” he exclaimed, “thou art
the richest, and I shall marry thee.”
FAIRY OINTMENT
Dame Goody was a nurse that looked after sick people, and minded babies.
One night she was woke up at midnight, and when she went downstairs,
she saw a strange squinny-eyed, little ugly old fellow, who asked her
to come to his wife who was too ill to mind her baby. Dame Goody didn't
like the look of the old fellow, but business is business; so she popped
on her things, and went down to him. And when she got down to him, he
whisked her up on to a large coal-black horse with fiery eyes, that
stood at the door; and soon they were going at a rare pace, Dame Goody
holding on to the old fellow like grim death.
They rode, and they rode, till at last they stopped before a cottage
door. So they got down and went in and found the good woman abed with
the children playing about; and the babe, a fine bouncing boy, beside
her.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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