We confess immortality to be a great and powerful goddess, but in vain
we offer up to her our devotions and our sacrifices if your Highness's
governor, who has usurped the priesthood, must, by an unparalled
ambition and avarice, wholly intercept and devour them.
To affirm that our age is altogether unlearned and devoid of writers in
any kind, seems to be an assertion so bold and so false, that I have
been sometimes thinking the contrary may almost be proved by
uncontrollable demonstration. It is true, indeed, that although their
numbers be vast and their productions numerous in proportion, yet are
they hurried so hastily off the scene that they escape our memory and
delude our sight. When I first thought of this address, I had prepared
a copious list of titles to present your Highness as an undisputed
argument for what I affirm. The originals were posted fresh upon all
gates and corners of streets; but returning in a very few hours to take
a review, they were all torn down and fresh ones in their places. I
inquired after them among readers and booksellers, but I inquired in
vain; the memorial of them was lost among men, their place was no more
to be found; and I was laughed to scorn for a clown and a pedant,
devoid of all taste and refinement, little versed in the course of
present affairs, and that knew nothing of what had passed in the best
companies of court and town. So that I can only avow in general to your
Highness that we do abound in learning and wit, but to fix upon
particulars is a task too slippery for my slender abilities. If I
should venture, in a windy day, to affirm to your Highness that there
is a large cloud near the horizon in the form of a bear, another in the
zenith with the head of an ass, a third to the westward with claws like
a dragon; and your Highness should in a few minutes think fit to
examine the truth, it is certain they would be all changed in figure
and position, new ones would arise, and all we could agree upon would
be, that clouds there were, but that I was grossly mistaken in the
zoography and topography of them.
But your governor, perhaps, may still insist, and put the question,
What is then become of those immense bales of paper which must needs
have been employed in such numbers of books? Can these also be wholly
annihilated, and so of a sudden, as I pretend? What shall I say in
return of so invidious an objection? It ill befits the distance between
your Highness and me to send you for ocular conviction to a jakes or an
oven, to the windows of a bawdyhouse, or to a sordid lantern. Books,
like men their authors, have no more than one way of coming into the
world, but there are ten thousand to go out of it and return no more.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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