Ernest Linwood; or, The Inner Life of the AuthorHentz, Caroline Lee
General
Ernest Linwood; or, The Inner Life of the Author
Hentz, Caroline Lee
Fiction
I suppose I must have slept, though I was not conscious of it, for I did
not hear Ernest enter the room, and yet when I looked again, he was
sitting in the opposite window, still as a statue, looking out into the
depths of night. I started as if I had seen a spirit, for I believed
myself alone, and I did not feel less lonely now. There was something
dejected in his attitude, and he sighed heavily as he turned and leaned
his forehead against the window sash.
I rose, and softly approaching him laid my hand on his shoulder.
"Are you angry with me, Ernest?" I asked.
He did not answer, or turn towards me; but I felt a tremulous motion of
his shoulder, and knew that he heard me.
"What have I done to displease you, dear Ernest?" again I asked. "Will
you not speak to me and tell me, at least, in what I have offended?"
"I am not offended," he answered, without looking up; "I am not angry,
but grieved, wounded, and unhappy."
"And will you not tell me the cause of your grief? Is not sympathy in
sorrow the wife's holiest privilege?"
"Gabriella, you mock me!" he exclaimed, suddenly rising and speaking in
a low, stern voice. "You know that you are yourself the cause of my
grief, and your words are as hollow as your actions are vain. Did you
not promise, solemnly promise never to deceive me again, after having
caused me such agony by the deception I yet freely forgave?"
"Tell me, Ernest, in what have I deceived? If I know myself, every word
and action has been as clear and open as noonday."
"Did you ever tell me your teacher was your lover,--he with whom you
were so intimately associated when I first knew you? You suffered me to
believe that he was to you in the relation almost of a father. I
received him as such in my own home. I lavished upon him every
hospitable attention, as the friend and guide of your youth, and now you
suffer me to hear from others that his romantic love was the theme of
village gossip, that your names are still associated by idle tongues."
"I always believed before that unrequited love was not a theme for vain
boasting, that it was a secret too sacred to be divulged even to the
dearest and the nearest."
"But every one who has been so unfortunate as to be associated with you,
seems to have been the victims of unrequited love. The name of Richard
Clyde is familiar to all as the model of despairing lovers, and even Dr.
Harlowe addresses you in a strain of unpardonable levity."
"O Ernest, cannot you spare even him?"
"You asked me the cause of my displeasure, and I have told you the
source of my grief, otherwise I had been silent. There must be something
wrong, Gabriella, or you would not be the subject of such remarks.
Edith, all lovely as she is, passes on without exciting them. The most
distant allusion to a lover should be considered an insult by a wedded
woman and most especially in her husband's presence."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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