Henceforth it seemed to Esther that she was eating all day. The food was doubtless necessary after the great trial of the flesh she had been through, likewise pleasant after her long abstinences. She grew happy in the tide of new blood flowing in her veins, and might easily have abandoned herself in the seduction of these carnal influences. But her moral nature was of tough fibre, and made mute revolt. Such constant mealing did not seem natural, and the obtuse brain of this lowly servant-girl was perplexed. Her self-respect was wounded; she hated her position in this house, and sought consolation in the thought that she was earning good money for her baby. She noticed, too, that she never was allowed out alone, and that her walks were limited to just sufficient exercise to keep her in health. A fortnight passed, and one afternoon, after having put baby to sleep, she said to Mrs. Rivers, "I hope, ma'am, you'll be able to spare me for a couple of hours; baby won't want me before then. I'm very anxious about my little one." "Oh, nurse, I couldn't possibly hear of it; such a thing is never allowed. You can write to the woman, if you like." "I do not know how to write, ma'am." "Then you can get some one to write for you. But your baby is no doubt all right." "But, ma'am, you are uneasy about your baby; you are up in the nursery twenty times a day; it is only natural I should be uneasy about mine." "But, nurse, I've no one to send with you." "There is no reason why any one should go with me, ma'am; I can take care of myself." "What! let you go off all the way to--where did you say you had left it--Wandsworth?--by yourself! I really couldn't think of it. I don't want to be unnecessarily hard--but I really couldn't--no mother could. I must consider the interests of my child. But I don't want you to agitate yourself, and if you like I'll write myself to the woman who has charge of your baby. I cannot do more, and I hope you'll be satisfied."