Dialect literature, Canadian; Fishing villages -- Fiction; Newfoundland and Labrador -- Fiction; Sea stories; Short stories
“‘I got hopes,’ says he. ‘Tom Neverbudge haves come down t’ twenty-two
seventy-five. You’ll find a old sock in the corner locker, Tumm,’ says
he, ‘with my fortune in the toe. Pass un here. An’ hurry, Tumm, hurry,
for I isn’t got much of a grip left! Now, Tumm,’ says he, ‘measure the
swile oil in the stage an’ balance me up for the las’ time.’
“‘How much you got in that sock?’ says I.
“‘Nothin’ much,’ says he. ‘Jus’ a little left over.’
“‘But _how_ much?’
“‘I’m not wantin’ t’ tell,’ says he, ‘lest you cheat me with kindness.
I’d have you treat me as a man, come what will.’
“‘So help me God! then, Bill Hulk,’ says I, ‘I’ll strike that balance
fair.’
“‘Tumm!’ he called.
“I turned in the door.
“‘Oh, make haste!’ says he.
“I measured the swile oil, neither givin’ nor takin’ a drop, an’ I
boarded the _Quick as Wink_, where I struck ol’ Bill Hulk’s las’
balance, fair t’ the penny, as atween a man an’ a man. Ah! but ’twas
hard, sir, t’ add no copper t’ the mean small total that faced me from
the page: for the fortune in the toe o’ Bill Hulk’s ol’ sock was light
enough, God knows! when I passed un over.
“‘Tumm,’ says he, ‘is it a honest balance?’
“‘It is,’ says I.
“‘Wait a minute!’ says he. ‘Jus’ a minute afore you tells me. I isn’t
quite ready.’
“I watched the sun drop into the sea while I waited.
“‘Now,’ says he, ‘tell me quick!’
“‘Nine eighty-three,’ says I.
“’Add t’ that,’ says he, ‘the twelve ninety-three in the sock. Quick,
Tumm!’ says he.
“I scribbled it out.
“‘Wait!’ says he. ‘Just a minute, Tumm, till I gets a better grip.’
“I seed ’twas growin’ quite gray in the west.
“‘Now!’ says he.
“‘Uncle Billy,’ roars I, ‘tis twenty-two seventy-six!’
“‘Send for Tom Neverbudge!’ cries he: ‘for I done it—thank God, I done
it!’
“I fetched Tom Neverbudge with me own hands t’ trade that grave for the
fortune o’ ol’ Bill Hulk,” Tumm proceeded, “an’ I seed for meself, as
atween a party o’ the first part an’ a party o’ the second, that ’twas
all aboveboard an’ ship-shape, makin’ what haste I was able, for Bill
Hulk’s anchor chain showed fearful signs o’ givin’ out.
“‘Is it done?’ says he.
“‘All fast,’ says I.
“‘A plot an’ a penny left over!’ says he.
“‘A plot an’ a penny,’ says I.
“‘Tumm,’ says he, with a little smile, ‘I needs the plot, but _you_ take
the penny. ’Tis sort o’ surprisin’,’ says he, ‘an’ wonderful nice, too,
t’ be able t’ make a bequest. I’d like t’ do it, Tumm,’ says he, ‘jus’
for the feel of it, if you don’t mind the size.’
“I ’lowed I’d take it an’ be glad.
“‘Look you! Bill Hulk,’ says Neverbudge, ‘if them graves is goin’ t’
trouble you, I’ll move un an’ pay the cost o’ labor. There, now!’ says
he; ‘that’s kind enough.’
“Bill Hulk got up on his elbow. ‘_What_’ll you do along o’ my plot?’
says he.
“‘Move them graves,’ says Neverbudge.
“‘You leave my plot be, Tom Neverbudge!’ says Bill. ‘What you think I
been wantin’ t’ lie in that plot for, anyhow?’
“Tom Neverbudge ’lowed he didn’t know.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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