MACI. Alas, the poor fantastic! he's scarce known To any lady there; and those that know him, Know him the simplest man of all they know: Deride, and play upon his amorous humours, Though he but apishly doth imitate The gallant'st courtiers, kissing ladies' pumps, Holding the cloth for them, praising their wits, And servilely observing every one May do them pleasure: fearful to be seen With any man, though he be ne'er so worthy, That's not in grace with some that are the greatest. Thus courtiers do, and these he counterfeits, But sets no such a sightly carriage Upon their vanities, as they themselves; And therefore they despise him: for indeed He's like the zany to a tumbler, That tries tricks after him, to make men laugh. FAL. Here's an unthankful spiteful wretch! the good gentleman vouchsafed to make him his companion, because my husband put him into a few rags, and now see how the unrude rascal backbites him! [ASIDE. DELI. Is he no more graced amongst them then, say you? MACI. Faith, like a pawn at chess: fills up a room, that's all. FAL. O monster of men! can the earth bear such an envious caitiff? [ASIDE. DELI. Well, I repent me I ever credited him so much: but now I see what he is, and that his masking vizor is off, I'll forbear him no longer. All his lands are mortgaged to me, and forfeited; besides, I have bonds of his in my hand, for the receipt of now fifty pounds now a hundred, now two hundred; still, as he has had a fan but wagged at him, he would be in a new suit. Well, I'll salute him by a serjeant, the next time I see him i'faith, I'll suit him. MACI. Why, you may soon see him sir, for he is to meet signior Puntarvolo at a notary's by the Exchange, presently; where he meant to take up, upon return. FAL. Now, out upon thee, Judas! canst thou not be content to backbite thy friend, but thou must betray him! Wilt thou seek the undoing of any man? and of such a man too? and will you, sir, get your living by the counsel of traitors? DELI. Dear wife, have patience. FAL. The house will fall, the ground will open and swallow us: I'll not bide here for all the gold and silver in heaven. [EXIT WITH FUNGOSO. DELI. O, good Macilente, let's follow and appease her, or the peace of my life is at an end. [EXIT. MACI. Now pease, and not peace, feed that life, whose head hangs so heavily over a woman's manger! [EXIT. SCENE II. -- ANOTHER ROOM IN THE SAME. ENTER FALLACE AND FUNGOSO RUNNING; SHE CLAPS TO THE DOOR. FAL. Help me, brother! Ods body, an you come here I'll do myself a mischief. DELI. [WITHIN.] Nay, hear me, sweet wife; unless thou wilt have me go, I will not go.