Evolution Of The Japanese, Social And PsychicGulick, Sidney Lewis
History
Evolution Of The Japanese, Social And Psychic
Gulick, Sidney Lewis
Japan -- Civilization; Japan -- Social life and customs; National characteristics, Japanese
Those who urge the "impersonality" of the Orient make much of the
Japanese idea of the "family," with the attendant customs. The fact
that marriage is arranged for by the parents, and that the two
individuals most concerned have practically no voice in the matter,
proves conclusively, they argue, that the latter have little
"personality." Here again all turns on the definition of this
important word. If by "personality" is meant consciousness of one's
self as an independent individual, then I do not see what relation the
two subjects have. If, however, it means the willingness of the
subjects of marriage to forego their own desires and choices; because
indeed they do not have any of their own, then the facts will not bear
out the argument. These writers skillfully choose certain facts out of
the family customs whereby to illustrate and enforce this theory, but
they entirely omit others having a significant bearing upon it. Take,
for instance, the fact that one-third of the marriages end in divorce.
What does this show? It shows that one-third of the individuals in
each marriage are so dissatisfied with the arrangements made by the
parents that they reject them and assert their own choice and
decision. According to the argument for "impersonality" in marriage,
these recalcitrant, unsubmissive individuals have a great amount of
"personality," that is, consciousness of self; and this consciousness
of self produces a great effect on the other party to the marriage;
and the effect on the other party (in the vast majority of the cases
women), that is to say, the effect of the divorce on the consciousness
of the women, constitutes the personality of the men! The marriage
customs cited, therefore, do not prove the point, for no account is
taken of the multitudinous cases in which one party or the other
utterly refuses to carry out the arrangements of the parents. Many a
girl declines from the beginning the proposals of the parents. These
cases are by no means few. Only a few days before writing the present
lines a waiting girl in a hotel requested me to find her a place of
service in some foreign family. On inquiry she told me how her parents
wished her to marry into a certain family; but that she could not
endure the thought and had run away from home. One of the facts which
strike a missionary, as he becomes acquainted with the people, is the
frequency of the cases of running away from home. Girls run away,
probably not as frequently as boys, yet very often. Are we to believe
that these are individuals who have an excessive amount of
"personality"? If so, then the development of "personality" in Japan
is far more than the advocates of its "impersonality" recognize or
would allow us to believe. Mr. Lowell devotes three pages to a
beautiful and truthful description of the experience known in the West
as "falling in love." Turning his attention to the Orient, because of
the fact that marriages are arranged for by the families concerned, he
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account