"More's the pity, no. And I've no time for one. I've a whole family of
consumptives on my hands at this moment, father, mother, two girls and a
boy."
"And you wear yourself out over a few minor effects like that, instead
of going at the cause. You may save one or two of those people--none of
them of any value, individually; while the same energy put to the root
of the evil might save thousands--and they _are_ of value in the mass.
Think me calloused if you like, but that's mere common sense economy of
effort. You and I--our class--make them live as they do, and we grow
maudlin over it and take them a little soup and many tracts. But we
won't remit our tithes. We keep them down to breed more misery for the
exercise of our little philanthropic fads. I'm radical, you see."
She turned her head away with a hand wave that seemed to dismiss an
argument familiar and outworn.
"I know--but I must do what I can."
He faced her with a sudden insistent energy.
"Come away, Nell--come farther off. You're too close to the ugly things
now--you lose the perspective. Come away--and come with me, won't you,
Nell? Come away and live. I must say it--I must ask it--come!"
He read the inexorable in the lift of her head.
"I understand, Alden--and I thank you--but no." She glanced across at
him and continued more lightly, "I wasn't meant to go far off--to go
above timber line, as Mr. Ewing would say."
He felt bitterness rising in him at her mention of the name, but he
laughed it away.
"You'll always do the hardest thing, Nell. I know that. But I--well, one
of the old heathen--Heraclitus, wasn't it?--remarked that the ass, after
all, would have his thistles rather than much fine gold."
She laughed. "Dad would say, the more ass he, if he wouldn't."
"I know--we'd rather have our own particular thistles, each of us. But
to live a day or two before we die, Nell! Come with me--stop trying to
mount the whirlwind. You'll only be thrown."
Again she shook her head, and gently shaped "No!" with her lips. It was
too unemotionally decisive to warrant of any further urging, and he
became silent, with something of pain in his face that her eye caught.
"I'm sorry, Alden--I've never liked you better--but I'd rather you
didn't ask."
"You wouldn't have come before, would you, Nell--three months ago?" And
she answered "No" again, very quickly.
"I must play my little game out in my own way," she continued. "I must
stay beside some one--beside people--who still have heart for trying."
"Someone, Nell?"
She caught her lip.
"Everyone who has fresh hope and stubbornness in defeat."
"If you'd let me, Nell--" There was the note of real pleading in his
tone.
"No, Alden."
"Friends, though?" he queried, seeming at last convinced.
She thought there was a trace of bitterness in his voice, but she
answered, "Friends, surely, Alden."
"We've skirted this thing often, Nell, but you never seemed certain
before."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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