As they sat about their camp fire that evening Ewing was struck by a
certain view he caught of her. She sat in shadow on a stool at the foot
of a towering hemlock, and once when he rose to stir the waning fire a
flame shot up from a half-burned log, with a volley of sparks that fell
back in a golden rain. He glanced over to be sure that she escaped
these, and saw her sharply revealed in the sudden light, unconscious of
it, unaroused by the crackling explosion. She was staring fixedly into
the darkness, her body relaxed, her hands half clasped, her head, the
profile toward him, leaning wearily against the tree. Before this
background she seemed frail again, her face pallid under the dark of
her hair and against the rough, ruddy brown of the tree bole, her whole
body contrasting in its fragile lines with the tree's strength--human
weakness showing starkly against the vigor of the woods.
To dull the sudden wanting of his heart for her he walked off alone over
the path that bordered the lake, to reduce the amazing actuality of
things, if he could, to proportions seemly with normal life. But the
lake was a mirror of enchantment, the booming of an owl was a magic
portent, the shadowed wall of granite was a turreted castle of
mysteries, vague in the starlight, and the very stars themselves huddled
down on him excitingly. He was in a world of the unreal, and must do an
unreal thing. He stumbled blindly back to camp. He was surprised to find
Mrs. Laithe as he had left her, still drooping against the rough-barked
tree, weak, submissive, overborne. He touched her arm gently to recall
her from some troubled distance. She looked at him with eyes unseeing at
first.
"Isn't it bedtime?" he suggested.
She smiled and stood up to shrug away the spell of her dreaming. She
spoke with such clear strength of tone that he was at once reassured of
her vigor.
"Yes, it's sleeping time--in a moment. I haven't said much to you, but
there's really little to say. You feel that you must go?"
"How could I stay here--after that?"
She repressed a sudden spasm of wild, weeping laughter that threatened
to overcome her.
"And you'll not come back?" She waited breathless.
"There isn't much chance of it."
"You dear, dear fool!" was on her lips, but she held back the words and
said very quietly:
"Go out, then, and live as you must. Only don't let life cow you. Don't
ever fear that living is intricate or hard or tragic--a thing to be gone
about warily. The wary people make the same mistakes as the careless
ones, and feel them ten times more. Don't be afraid to dream--afraid to
believe. I'm glad I've dreamed every dream of mine--false or true. Never
be afraid to want." She turned half away as if to go, but halted, and he
thought she had grown suddenly weak.
"You're going----"
"To-morrow, I'd thought--the sooner the better."
"Ah, but that's so soon. Can't we have one more day here? One more day
to think of it?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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