And how is it that this hallucination that you have fed full and been
satisfied, when all the while your hunger has not been appeased, can
continue to act on us? For the very plain reason that every one of us
has in himself a higher and a lower self, a set of desires for the
grosser, more earthly, and, using the word in its proper sense, worldly
sort--that is to say, directed towards material things, and a higher
set which look right up to God if they were allowed fair play. And of
these two sets--which really are one at bottom, if a man would only see
it--the lower gets the upper hand, and suppresses the higher and the
nobler. And so in many a man and woman the longing for God is crushed
out by the grosser delights of sense.
One sometimes hears of cowardly, unmanly sailors, who in shipwreck push
the women and children aside, and struggle to the boats. And there are
in all of us groups of sturdy mendicants, so to speak, who elbow their
way to the front, and will have their wants satisfied. What becomes of
the gentler group that stand behind, unnoticed and silent? It is an
awful thing when men and women do, as so many of us do, pervert the
tastes that are meant to lead them to God, in order to stifle the
consciousness that they need a God at all. There are tribes of low
savages who are known as 'clay-eaters.' That is what a great many of us
are; we feed upon the serpent's meat, the dust of the earth, and let
all the higher heavenly food, which addresses itself first to loftier
desires, but also satisfies these lower ones, stand unnoticed, unsought
for, unpartaken of. Dear friends, do not be befooled by that
treacherous heart of yours, but let the deepest voices in your soul be
heard. Understand, I beseech you, that their cry is for no created
person or thing, and that only God Himself can satisfy them.
III. And now, lastly, notice that a life thus ignoring God needs a
power from without to set it free.
'He cannot deliver his soul.' Can you? Do you think you can break the
habits of a lifetime? Do you think that, left to yourself, you would
ever have any inclination to break them? Certainly, left to yourselves,
you will never have the power. These long indulged appetites of ours
grow with indulgence; and that which first was light as a cobweb, and
soft as a silken bracelet, becomes heavier and solider until it is an
iron fetter upon the limb, which no man can break. There is nothing
more awful in life than the influence of habit, so unthinkingly
acquired, so inexorably certain, so limiting our possibilities and
enclosing us in its grip.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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