From this out he kept Bill's nose to the grinding-stone; and whenever
his complaint returned, he never failed to give him a hearty dose for
his improvement.
In the course of time, however, Bill was his own man and his own
master; but it would puzzle a saint to know whether the master or the
man was the more precious youth in the eyes of the world.
He immediately married a wife, and devil a doubt of it, but if _he_
kept _her_ in whiskey and sugar, _she_ kept _him_ in hot water. Bill
drank and she drank; Bill fought and she fought; Bill was idle and she
was idle; Bill whacked her and she whacked Bill. If Bill gave her one
black eye, she gave him another; _just to keep herself in
countenance_. Never was there a blessed pair so well met; and a
beautiful sight it was to see them both at breakfast-time, blinking at
each other across the potato-basket, Bill with his right eye black,
and she with her left.
In short, they were the talk of the whole town: and to see Bill of a
morning staggering home drunk, his shirt sleeves rolled up on his
smutted arms, his breast open, and an old tattered leather apron, with
one corner tucked up under his belt, singing one minute, and fighting
with his wife the next;--she, reeling beside him, with a discoloured
eye, as aforesaid, a dirty ragged cap on one side of her head, a pair
of Bill's old slippers on her feet, a squalling child on her arm--now
cuffing and dragging Bill, and again kissing and hugging him! Yes, it
was a pleasant picture to see this loving pair in such a state!
This might do for a while, but it could not last. They were idle,
drunken, and ill-conducted; and it was not to be supposed that they
would get a farthing candle on their words. They were, of course,
_dhruv_ to great straits; and faith, they soon found that their
fighting, and drinking, and idleness made them the laughing-sport of
the neighbours; but neither brought food to their _childhre_, put a
coat upon their backs, nor satisfied their landlord when he came to
look for his own. Still, the never a one of Bill but was a funny
fellow with strangers, though, as we said, the greatest rogue unhanged.
One day he was standing against his own anvil, completely in a brown
study--being brought to his wit's end how to make out a breakfast for
the family. The wife was scolding and cursing in the house, and the
naked creatures of childhre squalling about her knees for food. Bill
was fairly at an amplush, and knew not where or how to turn himself,
when a poor withered old beggar came into the forge, tottering on his
staff. A long white beard fell from his chin, and he looked as thin
and hungry that you might blow him, one would think, over the house.
Bill at this moment had been brought to his senses by distress, and
his heart had a touch of pity towards the old man; for, on looking at
him a second time, he clearly saw starvation and sorrow in his face.
"God save you, honest man!" said Bill.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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