Adoptees -- Fiction; Fathers and daughters -- Fiction
"How could that happen?" she said. "But do not, dear father, perplex
yourself with looking either forward or backward--repose on the present,
which has nothing in it to annoy you; or rather, your gallantry--your
devotion to the cause of an injured people, must inspire you with
feelings of self-gratulation, and speak peace to your troubles. Let the
rest of your life pass away as a dream; banish quite those thoughts that
have hitherto made you wretched. Your life is saved, despite yourself.
Accept existence as an immediate gift from Heaven; and begin life, from
this moment, with new hopes, new resolves. Whatever your error was,
which you so bitterly repent, it belonged to another state of being.
Your remorse, your resignation, has effaced it; or if any evil results
remain, you will rather exert yourself to repair them--than uselessly to
lament."
"To repair my error--my crime!" cried Falkner, in an altered voice,
while a cloud gathered over his face; "no, no! that is impossible!
never, till we meet in another life, can I offer reparation to the dead.
But I must not think of this now; it is too ungrateful to you to dwell
upon thoughts which would deliver me over to the tomb. Yet one thing I
would say. I left a short detail in England of the miserable event that
must at last destroy me, but it is brief and unsatisfactory. During my
midnight watchings in Greece, I prepared a longer account. You know that
little rosewood box, which, even when dying, I asked for; it is now
close to my bed; the key is here attached to my watch-chain. That box
contains the narrative of my crime; when I die, you will read it and
judge me."
"Never! never!" exclaimed Elizabeth, earnestly. "Dear father, how
cruelly you have tormented yourself by dwelling upon and writing about
the past! and do you think that I would ever read accusations against
you, the guardian angel of my life, even though written by yourself? Let
me bring the box--let me burn the papers--let no word remain to tell of
misery you repent, and have atoned for."
Falkner detained her, as she would have gone to execute her purpose.
"Not alone for you, my child," he said, "did I write, though hereafter,
when you hear me accused, it may be satisfactory to learn the truth from
my own hand. But there are others to satisfy--an injured angel to be
vindicated--a frightful mystery to be unveiled to the world. I have
waited till I should die to fulfil this duty, and still, for your sake,
I will wait; for while you love me and bear my name, I will not cover it
with obloquy. But if I die, this secret must not die with me. I will say
no more now, nor ask any promises: when the time comes, you will
understand and submit to the necessity that urged me to disclosure."
"You shall be obeyed, I promise you," she replied. "I will never set my
reason above yours, except in asking you to live for the sake of the
poor little thing you have preserved."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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