Fan : The Story of a Young Girl's LifeHudson, W. H. (William Henry)
General
Fan : The Story of a Young Girl's Life
Hudson, W. H. (William Henry)
Fiction
Fan went away, sad at heart, and cried by herself, fearing now that the
sweet lost love would never again return to brighten her life. But after
this passionate outburst Miss Starbrow was not less kind and gentle than
before. Once at least every day she would call Fan to her room and speak
a few words to her, and then send her away. The few words would even be
cheerfully spoken, but with a fictitious kind of cheerfulness; under
it all there was ever a troubled melancholy look; the clouds which had
returned after the rain had not yet passed away. To Fan they were very
much, those few daily words which served to keep her hope alive, while
her heart hungered for the love that was more than food to her.
Even in her sleep this unsatisfied instinct of her nature and perpetual
craving made her dreams sad. But not always, for on more than one
occasion she had a very strange sweet dream of Mary pressing her lips
and whispering some tender assurance to her; and this dream was so
vivid, so like reality, that when she woke she seemed to feel still on
face and hands the sensation of loving lips and other clasping hands,
so that she put out her hands to return the embrace. And one night from
that dream she woke very suddenly, and saw a light in the room--the
light of a small shaded lamp moving away towards the door, and Mary,
in a white wrapper, with her dark hair hanging unbound on her back, was
carrying it.
“Mary, Mary!” cried the girl, starting up in bed, and holding out her
arms.
The other turned, and for a little while stood looking at her; no ghost
nor somnambulist was she in appearance, with those bright wakeful eyes,
the curious smile that played about her lips, and the rich colour,
perhaps from confusion or shame at being detected, surging back into
her lately pale face. She did not refuse the girl's appeal, or try any
longer to conceal her feelings. Setting the lamp down she came to the
bedside, and taking Fan in her arms, held her in a long close embrace.
When she had finished caressing the girl she remained standing for some
time silent beside the bed, her eyes cast down as if in thought, and
an expression half melancholy but strangely tender and beautiful on her
face.
Presently she bent down over the girl again and spoke.
“Don't fret, dearest, if I seem bad-tempered and strange. I love you
just the same; I have come here more than once to kiss you when you were
asleep. Do you remember how angry you made me when you asked if you
had come between that man and me, and if I were sorry? You _did_ come
between us, Fan, in a way that his wholly corrupt soul would never
understand. But you could not have done me a greater service than
that--no, not if you had spilt your heart's blood for me. You have
repaid me for all that I have done, or ever can do for you, and have
made me your debtor besides for the rest of my life.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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