"Pardon me, ladies, for keeping you waiting," the actor said. "I was deep in conversation with the Minister. He was so charming, so kind!" He turned to the Baronne de Vibray. "He did me the honour to offer me a cigarette! A relic! Charlot! Charlot! You must put this cigarette in the little box where all my treasures are!" "It is very full already, M. Valgrand," said Charlot deprecatingly. "We must not keep you long," the Baronne de Vibray murmured. "You must be very tired." Valgrand passed a weary hand across his brow. "Positively exhausted!" Then he raised his head and looked at the company. "What did you think of me?" A chorus of eulogy sprang from every lip. "Splendid!" "Wonderful!" "The very perfection of art!" "No, but really?" protested Valgrand, swelling with satisfied vanity. "Tell me candidly: was it really good?" "You really were wonderful: could not have been better," the Baronne de Vibray exclaimed enthusiastically, and the crowd of worshippers endorsed every word, until the artist was convinced that their praise was quite sincere. "How I have worked!" he exclaimed: "do you know, when rehearsals began--ask Charlot if this isn't true--the piece simply didn't exist!" "Simply didn't exist!" Charlot corroborated him, like an echo. "Didn't exist," Valgrand repeated: "not even my part. It was insignificant, flat! So I took the author aside and I said: 'Frantz, my boy, I'll tell you what you must do: you know the lawyer's speech? Absurd! What am I to do while he is delivering it? I'll make the speech for my own defence, and I'll get something out of it!' And the prison scene! Just fancy, he had shoved a parson into that! I said to Frantz: 'Cut the parson out, my boy: what the dickens am I to do while he is preaching? Simply nothing at all: it's absurd. Give his speech to me! I'll preach to myself!' And there you are: I don't want to boast, but really I did it all! And it was a success, eh?" Again the chorus broke out, to be stopped by Valgrand, who was contemplating his reflection in a mirror. "And my make-up, Colonel? Do you know the story of my make-up? I hear they were talking about it all over the house. Am I like Gurn? What do you think? You saw him quite close at the trial, Comte: what do you think?" "The resemblance is perfectly amazing," said the Comte de Baral with perfect truth. The actor stroked his face mechanically: a new idea struck him. "My beard is a real one," he exclaimed. "I let it grow on purpose. I hardly had to make myself up at all; I am the same build, the same type, same profile; it was ridiculously easy!" "Give me a lock of hair from your beard for a locket," said the Baronne de Vibray impudently. Valgrand looked at her, and heaved a profound sigh. "Not yet, not yet, dear lady: I am infinitely sorry, but not yet: a little later on, perhaps; wait for the hundredth performance." "I must have one too," said Simone Holbord, and Valgrand with great dignity replied: