Her conscience, however, troubled her, and never more than to-night.
She could not account for it. Why on this particular night should
she be so vilely tormented? It was no use going to bed; she could
not sleep; at least not without a drug, and she had taken too many of
late. Sleep under such circumstances failed to soothe her; she awoke
with a heavy head and tired eyes, her body hardly rested.
She got up and walked to and fro in the room. She was debating what to
do, how to act. Never since her love affair with Hector Woodridge had
she met a man who appealed to her as William Rolfe did. The moment she
was introduced to him at the races she knew he was bound to influence
her life for good, or evil. She recognized the strong man in him, the
man who could bend her to his will; she knew in his hands she would be
as weak as the weakest of her sex, that she would yield to him. More,
she wished him to dominate her, to place herself in his power, to say
to him, "I am yours; do what you will with me." All this swept over
her as she looked into his eyes and caught, she fancied, an answering
response. She had felt much of this with Hector Woodridge, but not
all; William Rolfe had a surer hold of her, if he wished to exercise
his power, she knew it.
Did she wish him to exercise the power?
She thought no, and meant yes. Fletcher Denyer was useful to her, but
in her heart she despised him; he took her money without scruple when
she offered it. She was quite certain Rolfe would not do so, even if
he wanted it ever so badly. She had no fear of Denyer, or his
jealous moods. She smiled as she thought of him in his fits of anger,
spluttering like a big child. Rolfe was a man in every respect, so she
thought; she was a woman who liked to be subdued by a strong hand. The
tragedy in her life had not killed her love of pleasure, although the
result of it, as regards Hector Woodridge, had caused her much pain.
Still she was a woman who cast aside trouble and steeled herself
against it. She had not met a man who could make her forget the past
and live only in the present, but now she believed William Rolfe could
do it.
Would he try, would he come to her? She thought it possible, probable;
and if he did, how would she act? Would she confess what had happened
in her life? She must, it would be necessary, there would be no
deception with such a man. What would be the consequences--would he
pity, or blame her?
At last she went to bed, and toward morning fell asleep, a restless
slumber, accompanied by unpleasant dreams. It was eleven o'clock when
she dressed; she remembered she had to meet Fletcher and William Rolfe
at luncheon. She took a taxi to the hotel, and found Rolfe waiting for
her. He handed her a note; it was from Denyer, stating he was detained
in the city on urgent business, apologizing for his unavoidable
absence, asking Rolfe to meet him later on, naming the place.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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