Boarding schools -- England -- Fiction; Boys -- Fiction; Schools -- Fiction; Social classes -- England -- Fiction
But that was not his trouble on the nights when the steam merry-go-round
enlivened the small dormitory with “Over the Garden Wall” and
“Lardy-dah,” those egregious ditties of their day. It was the first
round of the All Ages Mile that kept Jan from sleeping either night
until the steam tunes stopped.
On the strength of his performance the year before and of several inches
since added to his stature, Jan had found himself seriously fancied for
a place in the Mile. The dash of premature notoriety, combined with a
superfluity of sage advice, made him sadly self-conscious and
over-anxious before the event, which ended in a complete fiasco so far
as he was concerned. It was his fate to meet the ultimate winner (down
with his eyes the year before) in the very first heat. Jan dogged him as
gratuitously advised, instead of making the running as flesh and blood
implored. And having no spurt he was not only badly beaten, but failed
even to come in third, and was thus out of the running in the first
round.
That was bad enough; hardy enemies of the Shockley type took care to
make it worse. They became suddenly alive to an alleged “roll” put on by
Jan in anticipation of his success; and Jan was sufficiently down on
himself to take their remarks for once to heart. He felt still more the
silence of many who had believed in him; even the cheery sympathy of a
few only aggravated his sense of failure; and as for the loquacious
Chips, and his well-meant efforts to keep the dormitory talk to any
other topic, they were almost as maddening as the steam merry-go-round,
that filled every pause with its infernal “Lardy-dah.” That tenacious
tune had supplied the accompaniment to his hopes and fears of the night
before; it had run in his head throughout the fatal race; and now it
made merry over his utterly idiotic and unpardonable failure.
It will be seen that the robust Jan had grown a crop of sensibilities
almost worthy of his friend Carpenter, except that Jan’s were wholly and
grimly inarticulate. But he was now sixteen, and that is the age of
surprises in a boy. It took Jan in more ways than one. It made him long
to do startling things, and it made him do some foolish ones instead;
hence his hard training for the mile, and his actual running when the
time came. It made him feel that he had done less than nothing at school
so far, that he was less than nobody, and yet that there was more in him
than anybody knew; and now he wanted them to know it; and now he didn’t
care a blow what happened to him, or what was thought, at a school to
which he had been sent against his will. There was no forgetting that at
a time like this. If he was a failure, if he went on failing, well, at
any rate it would be a score off those who had sent him there, and never
gave him enough pocket money, or wrote him an unnecessary line.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account