First Love: A Novel. Vol. 3 of 3Loudon, Mrs. (Margracia)
General
First Love: A Novel. Vol. 3 of 3
Loudon, Mrs. (Margracia)
Fiction
Our hero remained but one day at Lodore. To Mrs. Montgomery he explained
every thing, but the cause of his own feelings: the state of them he did
not attempt to hide. When Mrs. Montgomery spoke of Lady Susan’s marriage,
as the cause of his despairing letter, he neither confessed that it was,
nor said that it was not. This conduct the kind old lady construed into a
confession, that she was right. She, accordingly, after endeavouring to
rally him, without being able to extort a smile, closed the subject, by
gently hinting, that she had expected more firmness of mind from him: and
hoping, that a little change of scene, would make him, very shortly, see
things in quite another point of view.
Even Mr. Jackson, who, according to the determination he expressed on
first hearing Edmund’s letter read, had gone up to town, even he had not
been able to draw forth a word on the subject. Once, indeed, Fitz-Ullin
said, after a long reverie, and when no question had been asked: “The
longer I live, Jackson, the more strongly I feel the excellent truth of
your early lessons; had I always obeyed the suggestions of conscience,
not only in the letter, but in the spirit; had the plain road, pointed
out by duty, been resolutely trod; without waiting to inquire of passion,
if there were not a flowery by-path that would, ultimately, lead to
the same end; my present sufferings had possibly been, at least, less
poignant than they are.”
Mr. Jackson was, for a moment, puzzled, almost alarmed. “You can only
mean,” he said, “that it would have been more strictly honourable in
you, to have avoided Lady Susan’s society, while your birth was unknown,
and your fortune limited—Yet—as things have turned out—had her Ladyship
entertained a reciprocal preference, why—”
“In your kind zeal to place me on good terms with myself,” said Edmund,
mournfully, “you are becoming a sophist, Jackson! What had my sense of
duty to do with events which I did not, could not foresee?”
This was a sort of admission, that Mr. Jackson had been right, in
ascribing Edmund’s wretchedness to his disappointment, about Lady Susan;
but nothing more was said on the subject then, or at any other time.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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