Fog and frost had taken a strong grip, too, upon the heart of the lady
of the feathers. Somewhere about eleven o'clock in the morning she had
stirred wearily in her bed, had stretched out her arms to the stagnant
air of the room, and crouched up on her pillow in a grotesque hump. For a
while the hump remained motionless. Then Cuckoo rolled round and extended
a bare thin leg to test the atmosphere. The leg was quickly withdrawn,
the atmosphere having been evidently tried in the balance and found
wanting. Cuckoo's bell rang, and Mrs. Brigg was called for tea and toast,
while once more the hump decorated the upper part of the disordered bed.
Jessie, awakened in her basket at the foot of the bed, joined the hump,
whining a greeting, and wriggling furiously in an effort to tunnel her
way to the ultimate depths of sheets and blankets. Then Mrs. Brigg, of
yellowish and bleak aspect, beneath a tumbled appurtenance that she
called a cap, appeared with a tray.
"Going to stop abed?" she asked, in a husky voice, in which the smuts
seemed floating.
"Yes. What's there to get up for?" Cuckoo groaned.
"Nothun' as I know of."
And Mrs. Brigg was gone about her business.
All the morning Cuckoo lay staring at the blank square of the window, and
Jessie snored under the blankets. The tea was drunk, the toast lay about
in fragments. One bit, hard and many cornered as it seemed, somehow
gained entrance to the bed, and greeted Cuckoo's every movement with
uncompromising grittiness. No shaking of coverlet and sheet, no beating
of pillow, no kicks and scufflings could expel it. The bed seemed full of
hard bits of toast, and Cuckoo felt as if an additional burden were laid
upon her by this slight evil. But, indeed, the horror of her existence
reached a culminating point to-day,--a point of loneliness, vacant
dreariness, squalor, and degradation that could not be surpassed. The
preceding night had been peculiarly horrible, and as Cuckoo now lay on
the tumbled bed, in the dim, cold room, with the fog gazing in, the
leaden hours of winter crawling by, she felt as if she could bear no
more. She could bear no more addition to her sick weariness; no more
addition to her useless hunger of love for Julian, that could never
be crowned with anything but despair; no more addition to her bodily
fatigue, born of tramping monotony succeeded by yet more enervating
weariness of the flesh. She could bear no more. Yes, but she must bear
more. For Cuckoo knew that she was not dying, was not even ill. She was
only tired in body, prostrate in heart, deserted in life, and forced to
witness the quick and running ruin of the man she had the farcical
absurdity to love. Imaginative, for once, in her morbid fatigue, she
began to wish that she could fade away and become part of the fog that
lay about London, be drawn into its murkiness, with all her murky
recollections, her fiendish knowledge, her mechanical wiles of the
streets, her thin and ghostly despairs and desires. For they seemed thin
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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