"We ought never to have sat again after our conversation with the
doctor," Julian said. "I feel that to-day, so strongly. I feel that
perhaps we have taken just the one step too far,--the one step in the
dark that may be fatal."
"Fatal! My dear Julian, you are unstrung by the events of the night."
But the calm of Valentine's voice did not seem to sway Julian. He
continued:
"Valentine, now that I am with you, I am attacked by a strange idea."
"What is it?"
"That last night may have its consequences; yes, even though we strive to
forget it, and to forget our sittings. If it should be so! If anything--"
He was curiously upset, and did not seem able to-day to take the
influence of Valentine's mood. Indeed, this new anxiety of his was
only born in Valentine's presence, was communicated apparently by him.
"Everything one does has its following consequence," Julian said.
"It is the fashion to say so. I do not believe it. I believe, on the
contrary, that we often do things with a special view to the doctrine of
consequence, and that our intentions are frustrated by the falseness of
the doctrine. Suppose I kiss a woman. I may do so with intention to make
her love me, or, on the other hand, to make her hate me. The chances are
that she does neither the one nor the other. She simply forgets all about
such a trifle, and we go on shaking hands politely for the rest of our
natural lives. Julian, the memories of most people are like winter
days--very short."
"Perhaps. But there is some hidden thing in life whose memory is
everlasting. All the philosophers say so, especially those who are
inclined to deny the Deity. They put their faith in the chain of cause
and effect. What we have done,--you and I, Valentine,--must have an
effect of some sort."
"It will have a very bad effect upon you, I can see," said Valentine,
smiling, "unless you pull yourself together. Come, this is nonsense.
We have sat once too often, and the consequence followed, and is over:
I went into a trance. I have fortunately come out of it, so the penalty
which you so firmly believe in has been paid. The score is cleared,
Julian."
"I suppose so."
"I have no doubt of it. Let us forget the whole matter, since to remember
it seems likely to affect those devils that make the hell of the physical
man--the nerves. Let us forget it. Where are you dining to-night?"
"Nowhere in particular. I have not thought about it," Julian said, rather
listlessly.
"Dine with me then."
"Yes, Valentine."
Julian hesitated, then added:
"But not in Victoria Street, if you don't mind."
"At the Savoy then; or shall we say the Berkeley?"
"Very well,--the Berkeley."
"At eight o'clock. Good-bye till then. I must ask you to give the shelter
of your roof to Rip till he returns to a more reasonable frame of mind
about me."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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