A small degree of aversion to frivolous detail does not prevent me from describing a back-woods tavern. Like its owner, it commonly makes a conspicuous figure in its neighbourhood. It is a log, a frame, or a brick house, frequently with a wooden piazza in front. From the top of a tall post, the sign-board is suspended. On it, a Washington, a Montgomery, a Wayne, a Pike, or a Jackson, is usually pourtrayed, in a style that might not be easily deciphered except for the name attached. On the top of the house is a small bell, which is twice rung before meals. Immediately after the second peal, travellers and boarders assemble around the table, where they commence eating _without preface_. In such promiscuous {136} parties, the governor of a state, or a general of the militia, may be seen side by side with the waggoner. The larger towns having taverns of different qualities, and different rates of charges, a distinction of company is the natural consequence. We breakfast and sup on coffee or tea, accompanied with plenty of beef, bacon, chickens, and eggs. The hostess (or host if he is unmarried) takes her seat at the head of the table, and dispenses the tea. One or two _hired people_ (or slaves, in slave-keeping parts of the country) wait at table. At dinner, wheaten and Indian corn breads, beef, pork, venison, wild turkey, geese, and poultry, are staple articles; with a profusion of vegetables, such as cucumbers, onions, cabbages, beans, and preserved fruits. Lodging in taverns has not generally all the convenience that could be wished for. It is common to see several beds in the same room, and these are simple bedsteads without hangings. There are no bells in the bed-rooms, and other apartments; nor are menials accustomed to move at the signal of the stranger. Water is rarely to be met with in bed-rooms; washing is, of course, performed under a shed behind the house, or at the pump. A full house is always the apology for causing two strangers to sleep in the same bed; the propriety of the custom will always be admitted by the person who arrives latest. It has been my lot to sleep with a diversity of personages; I do believe, from the driver of the stage coach, to men of considerable name. The noted cutaneous disease is certainly not prevalent; if it was, the beds of taverns, which, like burying grounds, lay all on a level, would soon make the disease as prevalent in this country, as in some others in the old world. {137} If Europeans and others, who indulge in censorious remarks on western taverns and tavern-keepers, would make reasonable allowances for the thinly-settled state of the country, the high price of labour, and the great numbers of travellers, their criticisms might be somewhat softened. The man who cannot enjoy a placid temper under privation of a part of the comforts of a more advanced state of society, is surely to be pitied for having business in the back woods of America.