Bildungsromans; Fathers and sons -- Fiction; First loves -- Fiction; Ireland -- Fiction
I started. A glance at the top one had been sufficient. I recognized
the photographs George had kept hidden in his room, or others like
them. I looked at my father watching me, not angrily, but in a kind
of hopeless way; I looked into his gray, still face while he went on
speaking. “They were found in your bedroom hidden under the floor.
Uncle George says that George knows nothing about them, and, that
being the case, he felt it his duty to tell me. He does not mention
your name. I don’t know what to do. I have been trying to think.” He
looked at the wretched things, as they lay there, with a kind of horror.
I sat silent for a moment. “They’re not mine,” I then said. “I have
nothing to do with them.”
A gleam of relief came into his face, but it faded quickly. “You never
saw them before?”
I lifted the top one, but immediately put it back again. “I don’t know
whether I saw them before or not,” I answered. “If I didn’t see these
particular ones I saw others like them.” My father winced. “But they
never belonged to me. Even if I had wanted them I wouldn’t have known
where to get them.”
“Did you know of this hiding place?”
“Yes.”
“And of what was there?”
“Yes.”
“Only you and George occupied that room.”
“And George says they aren’t his.” I looked towards the window.
My father hesitated. Then he said solemnly, “Will you give me your word
of honour, Peter, that you had nothing to do with their being there?”
“I had nothing to do with it.” I answered quietly. “I knew they were
there, because George showed them to me. If he was here he would not
say they were mine. I knew what he was like from the first day I went
there. Those things were there then, and on the very first night he
wanted to show them to me, but he was frightened to. I did not see them
till a long time afterwards. I would never have seen them at all, if
you had let me leave when I first wrote to ask you to.”
“You gave me no reason,” said my father, sadly. “Do you think I should
have allowed you to stay an hour in the place if I had known?”
“You might have guessed there was _some_ reason. And at the time I
couldn’t give any――I didn’t know myself.”
“Had that anything to do with your not wanting to go back there after
Christmas?”
“In a way――more or less,” I answered. “Not exactly that, but other
things――――”
My father sighed. He tore the photographs in two, and placed them
in the empty grate, where he set fire to them. It was like an act
of purification, and when it was concluded he turned round and said
gloomily, “I’m sorry if I misjudged you. I accept your word.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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