“That parrot cry will make me murder you some day. Be a woman, with a
clear head on your shoulders, not a sniveling fool. Be a wife to me.” A
queer, mocking expression contracted his thin mouth. “Help me when you
can. If you offend Milligan----”
“I’ll never speak to him again. Good Heavens! You don’t want me----”
He sprung up from the table, took her by the trembling shoulder, and
swung her round.
“I don’t care what the devil you do,” he said deliberately.
She looked weakly up into his face, saw that he meant it, and began to
shake and sob. This was the worst blow he could deal. He meant it!
Hitherto she had attributed his brutalities to business worry.
She cried violently, hopelessly. She was all tears. She had no spirit
left, except the spirit that vents itself in extravagant words.
Suddenly she darted to the open window.
“If I were to jump down,” she began desperately; her feverish hands
clawed round the ledge, her wild eyes turned inward to the room.
“It wouldn’t be a bad solution.”
She ran back, tried to catch him round the neck with her pleading arms,
murmured pet names, shivered, sobbed, shook, tried vainly, in the wrong
way, to win back the old, transient adoration.
He wrenched himself away, as he would have freed himself from a skein.
“I’m sick of these rows,” he said savagely. “Do as I wish. Mind what
you’re at with Sutton--he knows a precious deal that I’d rather he
didn’t. Play Milligan. A clever woman would do it all without
compromise, but you are a prude--one of those ardent, faithful prudes
that make a man curse. Hang it all, I don’t want your extravagant
devotion; I’m in need of help. I don’t care what you do so long as I
don’t know--that’s married fidelity up to date. Do you understand?”
“I can’t--I won’t! My life is one degradation; you don’t care. If I
were some shameful woman, not your wife----”
“By George! if you knew all, you’re little better. That jargon in the
church--Sutton to give you away, the verger as best man--didn’t put you
on a pedestal of virtue.”
“I won’t--I can’t!” she repeated desperately, linking and unlinking her
hands, looking up at him with the devoted, obstinate eyes of a dog who
is afraid.
“Then go. You are a burden, an irritant.”
“You mean that?”
“Of course. I mean everything.”
He flung himself out of the room. Presently she heard him leave the
flat with Sutton.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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