She went back to the mahogany box, bent over it, brooded. She took out
the carver again, the poultry carver with the long slender blade and
the sharply pointed tip. She rubbed it stealthily along the stone
coping of the sink, then she carried it back to the kitchen and slowly
swished it backward and forward along the steel, doing everything as
silently as possible. By and by she drew the edge of the blade along
her finger. It was so keen that a thin red line of blood ran up.
She went upstairs. In one hand she carried the flat, winking
candlestick of brass, in the other the knife. Her fingers gripped the
smooth golden-brown handle convulsively. The wicked point she held
outward, her eyes fixed on it with much satisfaction. It was the best
thing after all. The tool-house, with its rude weapons of earth, had
not helped her. The knife-box had.
She was at the door of the room where she believed Pamela was sleeping.
Leaving the light outside, she turned the handle with a sure grasp. She
knew that the door could not be locked; the key was weighting her long
pocket. She had remembered to take away the key.
The room was dark. She went like a slow, certain arrow to the bed. All
her movements were slow, sure, horribly deliberate. She was used to
killing things. She knew that the great secret of success was to keep
cool. It didn’t seem to her any worse to kill a woman, when the woman
was a distinct obstruction and hindrance, than it was to kill a bird.
The knife was in her hand. She gripped the handle fiercely; the shining
red bone of her wrist stood out. She shut her eyes; it was a habit of
hers to shut her eyes at the very moment of killing--her ineradicable,
nervous, womanly habit.
She darted the point of the blade down, jabbing it furiously through
the heaped-up bedclothes. Then, her eyes hardly open, her hand out to
feel the way, she crept away, softly shutting the door behind her.
The hard lines of her worn face had relaxed, the feverish shine of her
eyes had given place to a calm light. The strained, hunted, uncertain
expression had gone forever. The rebellion and misery, the desperate
catechising of herself, were all ended. The question which, a year ago,
had rung and rung in her head so persistently, which had rung again so
noisily to-night when she heard that Pamela had come back, was
answered. That question, that weary, bitter question which had chimed
above her brow and made it ache so dully, would chime no more. There
was silence, a strange feeling of ease and lightness above her eyes,
where that maddening noise had been.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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