There--the question at last. Stephen took it as he would have taken a
blow between the eyes. He saw very clearly that the end of his reign had
come. He had done what he could and he had failed. But in him was the
fierce furious desire to fight for the boy. Why should he give him
up, now, when they had spent all these weeks together, when they had
struggled for their very existence side by side. What right had any of
these others to Peter compared with his right? He knew very well that
if he gave him up now the boy would never be his again. He might see
him--yes--but that passing of Peter that he had already begun to realise
would be accomplished. He might look at him but only as a wanderer may
look from the valley up to the hill. The doctor broke in upon him as he
stood hesitating there--
“Come,” he said roughly, “we have not much time. The boy may die. Has he
no friends?”
Stephen turned his back to Peter. “Yes,” he said, “I know where they
are. I will fetch them myself.”
The doctor had not lived in Bucket Lane all these years for nothing. He
put his hand on Stephen's arm and said: “You're a good fellow, by God.
It'll be all right.”
Stephen went.
On his way to Bennett Square a thousand thoughts filled his mind. He
knew, as though he had been told it by some higher power, that Peter
was leaving him now never to return. He had done what he could for
Peter--now the boy must pass on to others who might be able, more
fittingly, to help him. He cursed the Gods that they had not allowed him
to obtain work during these weeks, for then Peter and he might have gone
on, working, prospering and the parting might have been far distant.
But he felt also that Peter's destiny was something higher and larger
than anything that he could ever compass--it must be Peter's life that
he should always be leaving people behind him--stages on his road--until
he had attained his place. But for Stephen, a loneliness swept down upon
him that seemed to turn the world to stone. Never, in all the years of
his wandering, had he known anything like this. It is very hard that a
man should care for only two creatures in the world and that he should
be held, by God's hand, from reaching either of them.
The door of Brockett's was opened to him by a servant and he asked for
Mrs. Brockett. In the cold and dark hall the lady sternly awaited him,
but the sternness fell from her like a cloak when he told her the reason
of his coming--
“Dear me, and the poor boy so ill,” she said. “We have all been very
anxious indeed about poor Mr. Peter. We had tried every clue but could
hear nothing of him. We were especially eager to find him because
Miss Monogue had some good news for him about his book. There is a
gentleman--a friend of Mr. Peter's--who has been doing everything to
find him--who is with Miss Monogue now. He will be delighted. Perhaps
you will go up.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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