Frank Mildmay; Or, the Naval OfficerMarryat, Frederick
History
Frank Mildmay; Or, the Naval Officer
Marryat, Frederick
Great Britain -- History, Naval -- 19th century -- Fiction; Great Britain. Royal Navy -- Officers -- Fiction; Sea stories
I bowed to this _dictum_, only observing that there was a point in our
language where delicacy became indelicate; that I thought the noble
river had a priority of claim over a contemptible vessel; and, reverting
to the former part of his discourse I said that we in England were not
ashamed to call things by their proper names; and that we considered it
a great mark of ill-breeding to go round about for a substitute to a
common word, the vulgar import of which a well-bred and modest woman
ought never to have known.
The old gentleman felt a little abashed at this rebuke, and to relieve
him I changed the subject, hoping that the ladies would forgive for this
once, and return to their breakfasts.
"Why, as for that matter," said the gentleman, "the Philadelphia ladies
have very delicate appetites, and I dare say they have had enough."
Finding I was not likely to gain ground on that tack, I steered my own
course, and finished my breakfast, comforting myself that much execution
had been done by the ladies on the commissariat department before the
"Po" had made its appearance.
By the time I had finished, the ladies had composed themselves; and the
pretty Jemima had recovered the saint-like gravity of her lovely mouth.
Decked in shawls and bonnets, they expressed much impatience to be gone.
We walked to the dockyard, where a boat with a midshipman attended, and
in a few minutes conveyed us alongside of my ship. A painted cask
shaped like a chair, with a whip from the main yard-arm, was let down
into the boat; and I carefully packed the fair creatures two at a time,
and sent them up. There was a good deal of giggling, and screaming, and
loud laughing, which rather annoyed me; for as they were not my friends,
I had no wish that my mess-mates should think they belonged to that set
in Halifax in which I was so kindly received.
At length all were safely landed on the quarter-deck, without the
exposure of an ankle, which they all seemed to dread. Whether their
ankles were not quite so small as Mr McFlinn wished me to suppose their
appetites were, I cannot say.
"La, aunt!" said Deborah, "when I looked up in the air, and saw you and
Deliverance dangling over our heads, I thought if the rope was to break,
what a `squash' you would have come on us: I am sure you would have
_paunched_ us."
Determined to have the Philadelphia version of this elegant phrase, I
inquired what it meant, and was informed, that in their country when
anyone had his bowels _squeezed_ out, they called it "_paunching_."
"Well," thought I, "after this, you might swallow the Po without
spoiling your breakfasts." The band struck up "Yankee Doodle," the
ladies were in ecstasy, and began to caper round the quarter-deck.
"La, Jemima!" said Deborah, "what have you done to the western side of
your gown? it is all over white."
This was soon brushed off, but the expression was never forgotten in the
ship, and always ludicrously applied.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account