remembering Boston--the letters received there, where she was so much of
a centre and so little of a satellite, had seemed, in some way, lacking
in certain elements that Boston supplied, but that Merriston House, she
more and more distinctly saw, would never offer. She was, for her own
little circle, quite important in Boston. At Merriston House she would
be important only as Gerald Digby's wife and as the mistress of his
home, and that indeed--this was another slightly confusing fact--would
not be great importance. Even in Boston, she had felt, her importance
was still entirely personal; she had gained none from her coming
marriage. Her friends were perfectly accustomed to the thought of
coronets and ancient estates in connection with foreign alliances, and
Althea was a little vexed in feeling that they really did not appreciate
at its full value the significance of a simple English gentleman with a
small country seat. 'I suppose you'll live quite quietly, Althea, dear,'
more than one old friend had said, with an approbation not altogether
grateful to her. 'Your aunt tells me that it's such a nice little place,
your future home. I'm so glad you are not making a great worldly
match.' Althea had no wish to make a great worldly match, but she did
not care that her friends should see her upon such an over-emphatically
sober background.
The report of Gerald's charm had been the really luminous fact in her
new situation, and it had been most generously spread by Aunt Julia.
Althea had felt warmed by the compensatory brightness it cast about her.
Althea Jakes was not going to make a great match, but she was, and
everybody knew it, going to marry a 'perfectly charming' man. This,
after all, was to be crowned with beams. It was upon the thought of that
charm that she dwelt when the long meditations became oppressively
confused. She might be giving up certain things--symbolised by the
books, the fruit, the flowers, that testified to her importance in
Boston; she might be going to accept certain difficulties and certain
disappointments, but the firm ground on which she stood was the fact
that Gerald was charming. At moments she felt herself yearn towards that
charm; it was a reviving radiance in which she must steep her rather
numbed and rather weary being. To see his eyes, to see his smile, to
hear his voice that made her think of bells and breezes, would be enough
to banish wistfulness, or, at all events, to put it in its proper place
as merely temporary and negligible.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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