Short stories, American; United States -- Social life and customs -- 20th century -- Fiction
“Ed!” she called, jumping up suddenly and starting after him. “Ed!
Wait--don’t go! I’ll do what you say. I’ll do anything you want. You
don’t believe I will, but I will. I’m sick of this life, I really am.
I don’t care what they do to me now afterwards, but just the same I’ll
come. Please don’t be so hard on me, Ed. Can’t you see--can’t you
see--Ed--how I feel about you? I’m crazy about you, I really am. I’m
not all bad, Ed, really I’m not--can’t you see that? Only--only----”
and by now he had come back and was looking at her in an incredulous
way. “I wish you cared for me a little, Ed. Do you, Ed, just a little?
Can’t you, if I do this?”
He looked at her with mingled astonishment, doubt, contempt, pity, and
even affection, after its kind. Would she really do it? And if she did
what could he offer her in the way of that affection which she craved?
Nothing, he knew that. She could never extricate herself from this
awful group by which she was surrounded, her past, the memory of the
things she had tried to do to him, and he--he was married. He was happy
with his wife really, and could make no return. There was his career,
his future, his present position. But that past of hers--what was it?
How could it be that people could control another person in this way
she claimed, especially scoundrels like these, and why wouldn’t she
tell him about it? What had she done that was so terrible as to give
them this power? Even if he did care for her what chance would he have,
presuming her faithfulness itself, to either confront or escape the
horde of secret enemies that was besetting him and her just now? They
would be discovered and paraded forth at their worst, all the details.
That would make it impossible for him to come forth personally and make
the charge which would constitute him champion of the people. No, no,
no! But why, considering all her efforts against him, should she come
to his rescue now, or by doing so expect him to do anything for her by
way of return? He smiled at her dourly, a little sadly.
“Yes. Well, Imogene, I can’t talk to you about that now, not for the
present, anyhow. You’re either one of the greatest actresses and
crooks that ever lived, or you’re a little light in the upper story.
At any rate, I should think that you might see that you could scarcely
expect me to like you, let alone to love you, all things considered,
and particularly since this other thing has not been straightened out.
You may be lying right now, for all I know--acting, as usual. But even
so--let’s first see what you do about this other, and then talk.”
He looked at her, then away over the sea to where some boats were
coming towards them.
“Oh, Ed,” she said sadly, observing his distracted gaze, “you’ll never
know how much I do care for you, although you know I must care a lot
for you, to do this. It’s the very worst thing I can do for me--the
end, maybe, for me. But I wish you would try and like me a little, even
if it were only for a little while.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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