Fresh Every Hour: Detailing the Adventures, Comic and Pathetic of One Jimmy Martin, Purveyor of Publicity, a Young Gentleman Possessing Sublime Nerve, Whimsical Imagination, Colossal Impudence, and, Withal, the Heart of a Child.Toohey, John Peter
General
Fresh Every Hour: Detailing the Adventures, Comic and Pathetic of One Jimmy Martin, Purveyor of Publicity, a Young Gentleman Possessing Sublime Nerve, Whimsical Imagination, Colossal Impudence, and, Withal, the Heart of a Child.
Toohey, John Peter
Press agents -- Fiction
A sign reading, “Enter Your Pies Here,” attracted them to a railed-off
corner of the big office room. A stout woman in the skittish forties,
who was dressed like an ingenue, looked up at them from behind a table
on which a number of luscious looking apple pies reposed. On shelves on
the wall behind her, scores of other pies, all tagged, were arranged.
“Is this contest open to anyone?” inquired Jimmy bowing pleasantly.
“Certainly,” gushed the pie editor. “I’m so glad to see gentlemen in
this office. So many women have been in since we opened this contest
that it makes one feel rather lonesome for the stronger sex. Do you wish
to enter a pie?”
“Yes, m’am,” replied Jimmy promptly.
“Oh, a gentleman cook,” Miss Slosson rattled on. “How utterly adorable.
Do you know I’ve always felt that there was no reason on earth why a man
shouldn’t take a hand in the kitchen if he chose. It’s only a foolish
convention——”
“Please, Miss Slosson,” broke in Jimmy drowning out a chuckle from Tom
Wilson which seriously threatened to develop into a ribald laugh,
“please—the pie I want to enter wasn’t baked by myself. It isn’t baked
yet by anyone. I wanted to know if you’d be interested in having a pie
entered by Madame Olga Stephano?”
“You mean the Russian actress who’s coming to the Standard next week?”
asked Miss Slosson.
“Yes, m’am,” replied Jimmy. “I’m her manager and I just happened to see
the announcement of your contest and I remembered that she’s a great
cook and I thought perhaps you’d like to have her enter in the pie
stakes—that is, I mean I thought you’d like to have her bake a pie and
send it in. Apple pies are her specialty. Mr. Wilson here and myself ate
one cooked by her own hand last summer down at her country home on Long
Island. Remember that pie, Mr. Wilson?”
Jimmy’s confrere was equal to the emergency.
“I should say I did,” he quickly replied in his most dignified manner.
“How could I ever forget? It was a poem, a real lyric bit of pastry.”
“This is wonderful,” gurgled Miss Slosson, “perfectly wonderful! It will
give just the filip to this thing that I’ve been after. We can challenge
the women of the home to equal the culinary efforts of the women of the
stage. You understand, of course, that we must insist upon your entry
being bona-fide. We must have assurance that the pie has actually been
baked by Madame Stephano. How will she be able to bake it and how will
you get it here? Our contest closes the day after tomorrow, you know.”
“That’ll be all right, Miss Slosson,” returned Jimmy. “I’ll get her on
the long distance phone just as soon as I can get back to my hotel.
She’s playing in Chicago and she’s stopping with friends in a private
home. She’ll bake it right away and I’ll get her to ship it right
through by express. She’ll be tickled to death. The home is everything
to her. Most domestic little woman I ever met.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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