From Memory's Shrine: The Reminscences of Carmen SylvaSylva, Carmen
History
From Memory's Shrine: The Reminscences of Carmen Sylva
Sylva, Carmen
Queens -- Romania -- Biography; Sylva, Carmen, 1843-1916
One of my best and happiest experiences belongs however here, and must
not be forgotten. It relates to that very Fräulein von Bunsen, the lame
daughter, Emilie, “Aunt Mim,” as we afterwards called her, of whom I
have already spoken. And the incident was called forth by some childish
misdeed of mine, one of those trivial offences many would deem scarce
worth noticing, but for which with us a punishment utterly
disproportionate to the enormity of the crime was invariably inflicted.
I was thus on this occasion condemned to be left behind alone, while the
others set off joyously in five or six carriages to spend a day among
the hop-pickers,--a treat to which I had been looking forward for weeks
past. As they drove off, and I stood watching them sadly from the
balcony, seeing their happy faces and listening to their gay laughter,
feeling myself to be an outcast from the paradise towards which they
were setting forth,--it was then that the lame Fräulein von Bunsen,
happening to look up, caught sight of me, and before I could hide
myself, had waved her hand to me with a friendly smile that went far to
reconcile me with my lot and the world in general. The greeting, the
smile, fell on my wounded heart like balm. Up to that moment I had felt
somewhat like a condemned criminal, fearing that I must be looked down
upon and shunned by every member of that happy party, since it was known
to them all that I was deprived by my own fault of the pleasure of
joining them. But the kind thought, the kind smile, took away all the
bitterness of my reflections, and were treasured piously in my memory.
Years after, when I reminded dear Aunt Mim of the occurrence, I was
still more pleased to hear from her that my absence had been much
regretted, not by her alone, but by all the others, on that day. They
were all so sorry for me, she said, and missed the wonderful stories,
which I was never tired of telling on all such excursions. I had
forgotten all about that, my best stories being always made up for
myself alone, as I lay in bed in the morning, awake with the birds and
listening to their singing, and feeling the spirit of song just as alive
in me, while the rest of the house was still fast asleep. I only
remembered her kindness and the comfort it gave me, and until she
reminded me of it, had never thought again of that other unlucky day on
which the wheel of the little donkey-carriage, with her mother and
youngest sister sitting in it, passed over my foot, at which I took
care not to cry out or even make a face, and was only betrayed by the
torn condition of my shoe, which led to my being scolded and sent home
to have my foot bathed, instead of being allowed to continue my walk.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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