He answered the question himself by drawing from his waistcoat pocket
his only weapon, a small "Derringer," and taking aim at the foremost
bull. The shot took effect in the animal's shoulder, and he fell upon
his knees. As Arthur had expected, his nearer comrades stopped and
sniffed at their helpless companion. But, as Arthur had not expected,
the eager crowd pressing behind over-bore them and their wounded
brother, and in another instant the unfortunate animal was prostrate and
his life beaten out by the trampling hoofs of the resistless, blind, and
eager crowd that followed. With a terrible intuition that it was a
foreshadowing of his own fate, Arthur turned in the direction of the
_corral_, and ran for his very life!
As he ran he was conscious that the act precipitated the inevitable
catastrophe--but he could think of nothing better. As he ran, he felt,
from the shaking of the earth beneath his feet, that the act had once
more put the whole herd in equally active motion behind him. As he ran,
he noticed that the cattle before him retreated with something of his
own precipitation. But as he ran, he thought of nothing but the awful
fate that was following him, and the thought spurred him to an almost
frantic effort. I have tried to make the reader understand that Arthur
was quite inaccessible to any of those weaknesses which mankind regard
as physical cowardice. In the defence of what he believed to be an
intellectual truth, in the interests of his pride or his self-love, or
in a moment of passion, he would have faced death with unbroken
fortitude and calmness. But to be the victim of an accident; to be the
lamentable sequel of a logical succession of chances, without motive or
purpose; to be sacrificed for nothing--without proving or disproving
anything; to be trampled to death by idiotic beasts, who had not even
the instincts of passion or revenge to justify them; to die the death of
an ignorant tramp, or any negligent clown--a death that had a ghastly
ludicrousness in its method, a death that would leave his body a
shapeless, indistinguishable, unrecognisable clod, which affection could
not idealise nor friendship reverence,--all this brought a horror with
it so keen, so exquisite, so excruciating, that the fastidious, proud,
intellectual being fleeing from it might have been the veriest dastard
that ever turned his back on danger. And superadded to it was a
superstitious thought that for its very horror, perhaps, it was a
retribution for something that he dared not contemplate!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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