Gargantua and Pantagruel, Illustrated, Book 1Rabelais, François
General
Gargantua and Pantagruel, Illustrated, Book 1
Rabelais, François
Fantasy fiction, French -- Translations into English; Gargantua (Legendary character) -- Fiction; Giants -- Fiction
Sa, sa, sa, said Picrochole, by St. James you have given a true character
of them. One thing I will advise you, said Touquedillon. We are here but
badly victualled, and furnished with mouth-harness very slenderly. If
Grangousier should come to besiege us, I would go presently, and pluck out
of all your soldiers' heads and mine own all the teeth, except three to
each of us, and with them alone we should make an end of our provision but
too soon. We shall have, said Picrochole, but too much sustenance and
feeding-stuff. Came we hither to eat or to fight? To fight, indeed, said
Touquedillon; yet from the paunch comes the dance, and where famine rules
force is exiled. Leave off your prating, said Picrochole, and forthwith
seize upon what they have brought. Then took they money and cakes, oxen
and carts, and sent them away without speaking one word, only that they
would come no more so near, for a reason that they would give them the
morrow after. Thus, without doing anything, returned they to Grangousier,
and related the whole matter unto him, subjoining that there was no hope
left to draw them to peace but by sharp and fierce wars.
Chapter 1.XXXIII.
How some statesmen of Picrochole, by hairbrained counsel, put him in
extreme danger.
The carts being unloaded, and the money and cakes secured, there came
before Picrochole the Duke of Smalltrash, the Earl Swashbuckler, and
Captain Dirt-tail (Menuail, Spadassin, Merdaille.), who said unto him, Sir,
this day we make you the happiest, the most warlike and chivalrous prince
that ever was since the death of Alexander of Macedonia. Be covered, be
covered, said Picrochole. Gramercy, said they, we do but our duty. The
manner is thus. You shall leave some captain here to have the charge of
this garrison, with a party competent for keeping of the place, which,
besides its natural strength, is made stronger by the rampiers and
fortresses of your devising. Your army you are to divide into two parts,
as you know very well how to do. One part thereof shall fall upon
Grangousier and his forces. By it shall he be easily at the very first
shock routed, and then shall you get money by heaps, for the clown hath
store of ready coin. Clown we call him, because a noble and generous
prince hath never a penny, and that to hoard up treasure is but a clownish
trick. The other part of the army, in the meantime, shall draw towards
Onys, Xaintonge, Angomois, and Gascony. Then march to Perigot, Medoc, and
Elanes, taking wherever you come, without resistance, towns, castles, and
forts; afterwards to Bayonne, St. John de Luc, to Fontarabia, where you
shall seize upon all the ships, and coasting along Galicia and Portugal,
shall pillage all the maritime places, even unto Lisbon, where you shall be
supplied with all necessaries befitting a conqueror. By copsody, Spain
will yield, for they are but a race of loobies. Then are you to pass by
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