He felt sorry for her. When he had married Henrietta she had been the
only one who had understood. He could always remember what she had said
at the wedding. It was the only thing he could recall of the event--what
Doris had said to him....
"You'll never be a great man if you let yourself get trapped like this
too often."
Surprising that she should know enough to say that. Because anyone who
could say that to him must know him thoroughly and understand him
thoroughly. It was what he had been saying to himself for months before
the wedding.
He felt sorry for his sister. They were good friends in a way. A curious
way because he felt she detested him somehow. Yet she understood him and
could help him. And she liked him to come to see her. He wondered why.
She had no love for him but there was something about him that appealed
to her and interested her. He had noticed how she acted toward others.
Their talk left her dead. Even when Levine talked she often remained
unaware he was around. Her eyes never opened to people. Even her mother.
And Fanny had said, "Doris is getting more and more of a pill. I think
she's going crazy. She doesn't even look at a person anymore."
He watched her and thought, "Poor girl. Something wrong. I wish I could
help her."
He kept remembering how beautiful and alive she had been and his heart
felt an odd laceration as if something he loved were dying. Was he so
fond of Doris, then? He said, "no." Yet he could never remember having
felt such sympathy as this toward anyone. It was because she was an
intimate. He felt toward her as he felt toward himself--forgiving,
appreciative, and a sense of pity. Why had he thought that? Pity. Did he
pity himself, he, George Basine, who was just beginning to ascend?
Henrietta and the kids--that was it. A man had to accumulate troubles if
he was to amount to anything.
The feeling of sympathy slipped from his thought. Doris had turned her
eyes to him. Basine was aware of her coming to life. The symmetrical
mask of her face became features and expressions.
"Will you stay for tea?" she asked.
He would. Doris stood up and regarded him with a malicious smile.
"The crusade seems to be running away from you," she said.
He nodded. The public-spirited leader in him did not relish the ironic
tilt of her words. But he was able to assume a dual attitude toward her
cynical intellectualism. He could frown on it with a sense of outrage.
And he could listen to it with an appreciative shrewdness. He could
despise her iconoclasm and still utilize its intelligence to aid him in
his climb.
He had always understood that to his sister his aspirations were
contemptible. And yet despite her sneering she seemed anxious to help
him realize them. He understood, too, that in his sister's mind there
was something queer about people. When she talked about people her eyes
lighted. There was about her talk of people a clarity of idea that
contrasted strangely with the passion one could feel behind her words.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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