General Bounce; Or, The Lady and the LocustsWhyte-Melville, G. J. (George John)
General
General Bounce; Or, The Lady and the Locusts
Whyte-Melville, G. J. (George John)
England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
The General was a little disappointed with his guests, when, on the
retirement of the ladies, a magnum of undeniable claret exhaled its
aroma for their immediate benefit, and he found it did not by any
means disappear with that military rapidity to which he was accustomed
in his younger days. Charlie’s cough was a sufficient excuse for his
abstemiousness; and Frank Hardingstone, though he could drink a
bucketful on occasion, would not open his lips on compulsion; so the
General found himself in consequence obliged to grapple with the giant
almost single-handed. This, to do him justice, he undertook with
considerable _gusto_, and by the time he had got to the bottom of his
measure, had arrived at that buoyant state in which gentlemen are more
prone to broach such matters of business as they may think it
expedient to undertake, than to explain clearly the method by which
their desired ends can most readily be attained. Accordingly, when
Frank and Charlie rose to join the ladies in the drawing-room, our old
soldier called the latter back to the fire-place, and filling himself
a large bumper of sherry as an orthodox conclusion to the whole, bid
his nephew sit down again for five minutes, and have a little quiet
conversation on a subject which should not be too long postponed.
“Just three words, Charlie,” said the General, sipping his sherry;
“won’t you have a whitewash, my boy? Three hundred and sixty-five more
glasses in the year, you know. You won’t? Well, Charlie, I’m right
glad to see you back again. To-morrow I must go over everything with
you as regards money matters. Frank has told you all about the will.
What? Zounds! it was very singular--I confess I expected it all
along.” The General was one of those truest of prophets whose
predictions are reserved until the fulfilment of events. Finding that
Charlie took this extraordinary instance of foresight very coolly, he
proceeded, as he thought, to beat about the bush in a most skilful
manner.
“Well, Charlie, and how d’ye think we’re all looking, eh? Wear well
and struggle on, don’t we? I’ve taken pretty good care of your cousin
for you, my boy, during your absence. How d’ye think she’s looking,
eh?”
Charlie, who had not thought about it at all, answered, “Very well.”
And the General filled himself another glass of sherry and went
on--“By Jove, Charlie, I congratulate you on _that_, eh? Shake hands,
my lad. Zounds! we’ll drink Blanche’s health. Now I’ve put everything
_en train_. We can have the lawyers down at a moment’s notice.
Blanche’s _things_, to be sure, will have to be got; women can’t do
without such a quantity of clothes. Why, when Rummagee Bang’s widow
was burnt--however, that’s neither here nor there. Now tell me,
Charlie, when do you think it ought to come off?”
“My dear uncle, I can’t think what you’re talking about,” replied
Charlie, trying to look as if he didn’t understand; “I don’t see what
I’ve got to do with Blanche’s things.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account