"Gentlemen prefer blondes" : $b The illuminating diary of a professional ladyLoos, Anita
General
"Gentlemen prefer blondes" : $b The illuminating diary of a professional lady
Loos, Anita
Diary fiction; Humorous stories; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Millionaires -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
Well Mr. Spoffard and I and Dorothy are on the train again and we are
all going to Vienna. I mean Mr. Spoffard and I spent one whole day
going through all of the museums in Munchen, but I am really not even
going to think about it. Because when something terrible happens to me,
I always try to be a Christian science and I simply do not even think
about it, but I deny that it ever happened even if my feet do seem to
hurt quite a lot. So even Dorothy had quite a hard day in Munchen
because her German gentleman friend, who is called Rudolf, came for her
at 11 oclock to take her to breakfast. But Dorothy told him that she
had had her breakfast. But her gentleman friend said that he had had
his first breakfast to, but it was time for his second. So he took
Dorothy to the Half Brow house where everybody eats white sausages and
pretzels and beer at 11 oclock. So after they had their white sausages
and beer he wanted to take her for a ride but they could only go a few
blocks because by then it was time for luncheon. So they ate quite a
lot of luncheon and then he bought her a large size box of chocolates
that were full of liqueurs, and took her to the matinee. So after the
first act Rudolf got hungry and they had to go and stand in the lobby
and have some sandwitches and beer. But Dorothy did not enjoy the show
very much and so after the second act Rudolf said they would leave
because it was time for tea anyway. So after quite a heavy tea, Rudolph
asked her to dinner and Dorothy was to overcome to say No. So after
dinner they went to a beer garden for beer and pretzels. But finally
Dorothy began to come to, and she asked him to take her back to the
hotel. So Rudolf said he would, but they had better have a bite to eat
first. So today Dorothy really feels just as discouradged as I seem to
feel, only Dorothy is not a Christian science and all she can do is
suffer.
But in spite of all of my Christian science, I am really beginning to
feel quite discouradged about Vienna. I mean Mr. Eisman is in Vienna,
and I do not see how I can spend quite a lot of time with Mr. Eisman
and quite a lot of time with Mr. Spoffard and keep them from meeting
one another. Because Mr. Spoffard might not seem to understand why Mr.
Eisman seems to spend quite a lot of money to get me educated. And
Dorothy keeps trying to depress me about Miss Chapman because she says
she thinks that when Miss Chapman sees I and Mr. Spoffard together she
thinks that Miss Chapman will cable for the familys favorite lunacy
expert. So I have got to be as full of Christian science as I can and
always hope for the best.
May 25th:
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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