And thus her yielding, unresisting soul Sank, and let sin confuse her and control: Pleasures that brought disgust yet brought relief, And minds she hated help’d to war with grief.” “Thus then she perish’d?”-- “Nay--but thus she proved Slave to the vices that she never loved; But, while she thus her better thoughts opposed, And woo’d the world, the world’s deceptions closed.-- I had long lost her; but I sought in vain 710 To banish pity--still she gave me pain; Still I desired to aid her--to direct, And wish’d the world, that won her, to reject; Nor wish’d in vain--there came, at length, request That I would see a wretch with grief oppress’d, By guilt affrighted--and I went to trace Once more the vice-worn features of that face, That sin-wreck’d being! and I saw her laid Where never worldly joy a visit paid, That world receding fast! the world to come 720 Conceal’d in terror, ignorance, and gloom, Sins, sorrow, and neglect: with not a spark Of vital hope--all horrible and dark-- It frighten’d me!--I thought, and shall not I } Thus feel? thus fear?--this danger can I fly? } Do I so wisely live that I can calmly die? } “The wants I saw I could supply with ease, But there were wants of other kind than these; Th’ awakening thought, the hope-inspiring view-- } The doctrines awful, grand, alarming, true-- } 730 Most painful to the soul, and yet most healing too. } Still, I could something offer, and could send For other aid--a more important friend, Whose duty call’d him, and his love no less, To help the grieving spirit in distress; To save in that sad hour the drooping prey, And from its victim drive despair away. All decent comfort[s] round the sick were seen; The female helpers quiet, sober, clean; Her kind physician with a smile appear’d, 740 And zealous love the pious friend endear’d; While I, with mix’d sensations, could inquire, ‘Hast thou one wish, one unfulfill’d desire? Speak every thought, nor unindulged depart, If I can make thee happier than thou art.’ “Yes! there was yet a female friend, an old And grieving nurse! to whom it should be told-- I would tell--that she, her child, had fail’d, And turn’d from truth! yet truth at length prevail’d. “’Twas in that chamber, Richard, I began 750 To think more deeply of the end of man: Was it to jostle all his fellows by, To run before them, and say, ‘here am I, Fall down, and worship?’--Was it, life throughout, With circumspection keen to hunt about, As spaniels for their game, where might be found Abundance more for coffers that abound? Or was it life’s enjoyments to prefer, Like this poor girl, and then to die like her?