MRS GEORGE. Many people would laugh at it. THE BISHOP. Poor people! It's so hard to know the right place to laugh, isnt it? MRS GEORGE. I didnt mean to make you think the letters were from a fine lady. I wrote on cheap paper; and I never could spell. THE BISHOP. Neither could I. So that told me nothing. MRS GEORGE. One thing I should like you to know. THE BISHOP. Yes? MRS GEORGE. We didnt cheat your friend. They were as good as we could do at thirteen shillings a ton. THE BISHOP. Thats important. Thank you for telling me. MRS GEORGE. I have something else to say; but will you please ask somebody to come and stay here while we talk? [He rises and turns to the study door]. Not a woman, if you dont mind. [He nods understandingly and passes on]. Not a man either. THE BISHOP [stopping] Not a man and not a woman! We have no children left, Mrs Collins. They are all grown up and married. MRS GEORGE. That other clergyman would do. THE BISHOP. What! The sexton? MRS GEORGE. Yes. He didnt mind my calling him that, did he? It was only my ignorance. THE BISHOP. Not at all. [He opens the study door and calls] Soames! Anthony! [To Mrs George] Call him Father: he likes it. [Soames appears at the study door]. Mrs Collins wishes you to join us, Anthony. Soames looks puzzled. MRS GEORGE. You dont mind, Dad, do you? [As this greeting visibly gives him a shock that hardly bears out the Bishop's advice, she says anxiously] That was what you told me to call him, wasnt it? SOAMES. I am called Father Anthony, Mrs Collins. But it does not matter what you call me. [He comes in, and walks past her to the hearth]. THE BISHOP. Mrs Collins has something to say to me that she wants you to hear. SOAMES. I am listening. THE BISHOP [going back to his seat next her] Now. MRS GEORGE. My lord: you should never have married. SOAMES. This woman is inspired. Listen to her, my lord. THE BISHOP [taken aback by the directness of the attack] I married because I was so much in love with Alice that all the difficulties and doubts and dangers of marriage seemed to me the merest moonshine. MRS GEORGE. Yes: it's mean to let poor things in for so much while theyre in that state. Would you marry now that you know better if you were a widower? THE BISHOP. I'm old now. It wouldnt matter. MRS GEORGE. But would you if it did matter? THE BISHOP. I think I should marry again lest anyone should imagine I had found marriage unhappy with Alice. SOAMES [sternly] Are you fonder of your wife than of your salvation? THE BISHOP. Oh, very much. When you meet a man who is very particular about his salvation, look out for a woman who is very particular about her character; and marry them to one another: theyll make a perfect pair. I advise you to fall in love; Anthony. SOAMES [with horror] I!!