'And a fat lot of good it will do,' said Peleg. 'Gentlemen, if you knew him as well as I, if you had my barometer to read him by, you'd see that the only remedy is to put him in _Cherem_' (excommunication). 'If he can't get buried it _is_ a kind of _Cherem_,' said the _Gabbai_. 'Assuredly,' added the _Parnass_. 'He will be frightened to think that if he dies suddenly----' 'And he is sure to take a sudden death,' put in Barzinsky with unction. 'He will not be buried among Jews,' wound up the _Parnass_. 'Hear, hear!' A murmur of satisfaction ran round the table. All felt that Simeon Samuels was cornered at last. It was resolved that the resolution be sent to him. XVI 'Mr. Simeon Samuels requests me to say that he presents his compliments to the secretary of the Sudminster Hebrew Congregation, and begs to acknowledge the receipt of the Council's resolution. In reply I am to state that Mr. Samuels regrets that his views on the Sabbath question should differ from those of his fellow-worshippers, but he has not attempted to impress his views on the majority, and he regrets that in a free country like England they should have imported the tyranny of the lands of persecution from which they came. Fortunately such procedure is illegal. By the act of Charles I. the Sabbath is defined as the Sunday, and as a British subject Mr. Samuels takes his stand upon the British Constitution. Mr. Samuels has done his best to compromise with the congregation by attending the Sabbath service on the day most convenient to the majority. In regard to the veiled threat of the refusal of burial rights, Mr. Samuels desires me to say that he has no intention of dying in Sudminster, but merely of getting his living there. In any case, under his will, his body is to be deported to Jerusalem, where he has already acquired a burying-place.' 'Next year in Jerusalem!' cried Barzinsky fervently, when this was read to the next meeting. 'Order, order,' said the _Parnass_. 'I don't believe in his Jerusalem grave. They won't admit his dead body.' 'He relies on smuggling in alive,' said Barzinsky gloomily, 'as soon as he has made his pile.' 'That won't be very long at this rate,' added Ephraim Mendel. 'The sooner the better,' said the _Gabbai_ impatiently. 'Let him go to Jericho.' There was a burst of laughter, to the _Gabbai's_ great astonishment. 'Order, order, gentlemen,' said the _Parnass_. 'Don't you see from this insolent letter how right I was? The rascal threatens to drag us to the Christian Courts, that's clear. All that about Jerusalem is only dust thrown into our eyes.' 'Grave-dust,' murmured Straumann. 'Order! He is a dangerous customer.' 'Shopkeeper,' corrected Straumann. The _Parnass_ glared, but took snuff silently. 'I don't wonder he laughed at us,' said Straumann, encouraged. '_Bi_-weekly _by_ a member. Ha! ha! ha!' 'Mr. President!' Barzinsky screamed. 'Will you throw that laughing hyena out, or shall I?'