'I shall never forget the pained and melancholy expression of his
features when I did so, or the few words he uttered. He said that he had
not ventured to hope for a different answer, though he had dared to
speak, and that his one slight prospect of happiness had vanished. He
had now nothing but a life of labour before him, without a gleam of hope
to cheer his way, but that he should think of me always, and of the
happy hours we had passed together. I felt so sorry for him that I could
really say nothing, either to cheer or discourage him. He simply asked
me to allow him to remain my friend, and to forgive his presumption; and
so we shook hands and parted. He did not join the family that evening,
and the next day I left the Merryweathers.
'I do not know how it was, but when I returned home, I thought more of
this young man than of any one else. Although my sister and myself were
surrounded by men of a very different, and I may say, superior class,
still he haunted me very much, for a time at least.
'Then came my sister's marriage, which proved, as you know, unfortunate
in a pecuniary point of view, and her and her husband's emigration to
Australia in search of fortune. Then followed our own ruin, and my
father's paralytic seizure. To help my parents and support myself, I
came to you as governess. You know, dearest Freda, how happy your dear
mother made me as long as she lived, and how ardently I desired to
fulfil her dying wish that I should finish your education. Most thankful
I am that I was permitted to do so.
'I need not tell you, over and over again, the sad story of my mother's
death, and my return home to live with my father, and become a daily
instead of a resident governess. All the happiness I have known--at
least the greatest--since our troubles, has been in this house.
'But this has nothing to do with Mr Jones. I heard, casually from my
friend, Mrs Merryweather, that he had left them and gone to college;
what college, she did not say. For some years I had quite enough of
painful duty to perform to make me forget the weeks passed in his
society, and their termination; or to think of a person of whom I had
quite lost sight. About six or seven years ago, however, I heard of him,
strange to say, through my sister. I had, of course, told her of his
proposal and my refusal.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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