Gothic fiction; Ireland -- History -- Rebellion of 1798 -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Romans à clef
“Do you remember,” said Glenarvon, “that day when I first told you of my
love? You blushed then, and wept: did you not? But you have forgotten
to do either now. Why, then, this strange confusion?”—“I am sick at
heart. Leave me.”—“Never! O most loved, most dear of all earthly beings,
turn not thus away from me; look not as if you feared to meet me; feel
not regret; for if it be a crime, that be on me, Calantha—on me alone.
I know how men of the world can swear and forswear: I know, too, how
much will be attempted to sever you from me: but by that God in whose
sacred eye we stand; by all that the human heart and soul can believe
and cherish, I am not one of that base kind, who would ever betray the
woman that trusted in me. Even were you unfaithful to me, I could not
change. You are all on earth that I love, and, perhaps what is better
worth, that I esteem and respect—that I honor as above every other in
goodness, purity and generous noble feelings. O! think not so humbly
of yourself: say not that you are degraded. My admiration of you shall
excuse your error: my faithful attachment whilst existence is given to
either of us shall atone for all. Look on me, my only friend; dry up
the tears that fall for an involuntary fault; and consider me as your
protector, your lover, your husband.”
There required not many words, not many protestations. Calantha wept
bitterly; but she felt happy. “If you change now,” she said, “what will
become of me? Let me go with you, Glenarvon, from this country: I ask
not for other ties than those that already bind us. Yet I once more
repeat it, I know you must despise me.”—“What are words and vows, my
heart’s life, my soul’s idol, what are they? The false, the vain, the
worldly-minded have made use of them; but I must have recourse to them,
Calantha, since you can look at me, and yet mistrust me. No villany that
ever yet existed, can exceed that which my falsehood to you would now
evince. This is no common worldly attachment: no momentary intoxication of
passion. Often I have loved: many I have seen; but none ever sacrificed
for me what you have done; and for none upon earth did I ever feel what
I do for you. I might have made you mine long ago: perhaps I might have
abused the confidence shewn me, and the interest and enthusiasm I had
created; but, alas! you would then have despised me. I conquered myself;
but it was to secure you more entirely. I am yours only: consent therefore
to fly with me. Make any trial you please of my truth. What I speak I
have written: my letters you may shew, my actions you may observe and
sift. I have not one thought that is unknown to you—one wish, one hope
of which you are not the first and sole object. Many disbelieve that I
am serious in my desire that you should accompany me in my flight. They
know me not: I have no views, no projects. Men of the world look alone
to fortune, fame, or interest; but what am I? The sacrifice is solely on
your part: I would to God it were on mine.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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