Good-bye to all that : $b An autobiographyGraves, Robert
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Good-bye to all that : $b An autobiography
Graves, Robert
Authors, English -- 20th century -- Biography; Graves, Robert, 1895-1985; World War, 1914-1918 -- Personal narratives, British
After one particularly bad spell of trenches I got bad news in a
letter from Charterhouse. Bad news in the trenches might affect a man
in either of two ways. It might drive him to suicide (or recklessness
amounting to suicide), or it might seem trivial in comparison with
present expediences and be disregarded. But unless his leave was due
he was helpless. A year later, when I was in trenches in the same
sector, an officer of the North Staffordshire Regiment had news from
home that his wife was living with another man. He went out on a raid
the same night and was either killed or captured; so the men with him
said. There had been a fight and they had come back without him. Two
days later he was arrested at Béthune trying to board a leave-train
to go home; he had intended to shoot up the wife and her lover. He
was court-martialled for deserting in the face of the enemy, but
the court was content to cashier him. He went as a private soldier to
another regiment. I do not know what happened afterwards.
The bad news was about Dick, saying that he was not at all the innocent
sort of fellow I took him for. He was as bad as anyone could be. The
letter was written by a cousin of mine who was still at Charterhouse.
I tried not to believe it. I remembered that he owed me a grudge and
decided that this was a very cruel act of spite. Dick’s letters had
been my greatest stand-by all these months when I was feeling low;
he wrote every week, mostly about poetry. They were something solid
and clean to set off against the impermanence of trench life and
the uncleanness of sex-life in billets. I was now back in Béthune.
Two officers of another company had just been telling me how they
had jslept, in the same room, one with the mother and one with the
daughter. They had tossed for the mother because the daughter was a
‘yellow-looking little thing like a lizard.’ And the Red Lamp, the army
brothel, was round the corner in the main street. I had seen a queue
of a hundred and fifty men waiting outside the door, each to have his
short turn with one or the other of the three women in the house. My
servant, who had been in the queue, told me that the charge was ten
francs a man—about eight shillings at that time. Each woman served
nearly a battalion of men every week for as long as she lasted. The
assistant provost-marshal had told me that three weeks was the usual
limit, ‘after which the woman retires on her earnings, pale but proud.’
I was always being teased because I would not sleep even with the nicer
girls. And I excused myself, not on moral grounds or on grounds of
fastidiousness, but in the only way they could understand: I said that
I didn’t want a dose. A good deal of talk in billets was about
the peculiar bed-manners of the French women. ‘She was very nice and
full of games. I said to her: “S’il vous plaît, ôtes-toi la chemise, ma
chérie.” But she wouldn’t. She said, “Oh no’-non, mon lieutenant. Ce
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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