Graham's Magazine, Vol. XXI, No. 4, October 1842Various
General
Graham's Magazine, Vol. XXI, No. 4, October 1842
Various
Literature -- Periodicals; Literature, Modern -- 19th century -- Periodicals
For several days Ernest absented himself from Mr. Allison’s house, but
just as every body was beginning to wonder what could ail him, he came,
and took his accustomed seat, as quiet and perhaps rather more silent
than was his wont. He looked pale and care-worn, but his mother’s
renewed paroxysm of illness was sufficient to account for his
appearance, and though his lip quivered and his hand trembled as he
offered his congratulations to Mary, yet no one could have dreamed that
beneath his calm seeming he concealed an immolated heart. Mary’s pride
rose to her aid when she beheld Ernest’s undisturbed demeanor. She
almost despised herself for the weakness which made her shudder as with
an ague, when he offered his wishes for her future happiness; and,
resolutely closing her bosom against all such emotions, she determined
to perform the duties she had undertaken with a firm and unyielding
spirit.
The increasing illness of the invalid, Mrs. Melvyn, soon confined Ernest
so closely to his home, during his leisure hours, that he thus escaped
the torture of witnessing the arrangements for Mary’s marriage. It was
perhaps fortunate for both, since the tie between them was now to be
severed, that it should be done thus gradually, and from a sense of duty
to others, rather than from selfish feelings. At times Mary half
suspected that Ernest loved her, but the stern, self-sacrificing
devotion of him who believed that she had chosen wisely and well,
destroyed the fancy ere it became a hope. “She has fulfilled the wishes
of her father—she has found love and happiness,” said Ernest to
himself, “and not one shadow from the cloud which impends over my fate
shall ever darken her path.” And with a courage far more exalted than
that which binds the martyr to the faggot and the stake, did this
noble-hearted being crush his own heart within him, lest he should mar
the hopes of her whom he loved better than life.
Ernest did not see Mary wedded. On the very night of her bridal his
mother died, and, in the awful stillness of the death-chamber, the voice
of passion was hushed into silence. It was not until his only companion
was laid in her humble grave, and the quiet of exhaustion had gradually
stolen over the tortured feelings of the bereaved and heart-sick Ernest,
that he ventured to approach the dwelling of Mr. Allison. Amid their
festivities the family had not been regardless of his sorrow, and many
an act of unobtrusive kindness had shown him that he was affectionately
remembered among them. But he had learned some sad and solemn truths as
he watched beside his dying mother. The nothingness of human cares, the
vanity of human hopes, the fruitlessness of human affections had been
deeply impressed upon his heart. His mother’s last lesson, imparted in
the peacefulness of her dying hour, came with thrilling power to his
bosom, and in the loneliness of his deep grief he learned life’s hardest
lesson—“_to suffer and be still_.”
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