Graham's Magazine, Vol. XXXV, No. 6, December 1849Various
General
Graham's Magazine, Vol. XXXV, No. 6, December 1849
Various
Literature -- Periodicals; Literature, Modern -- 19th century -- Periodicals
“I believe, sir, you are in a condition to feel some sympathy for those
whom fortune has not deigned to favor. I can, then, without a blush
acknowledge to you that I am one of her victims. Happily, I have not
received in the New World, where I passed many years, severe lessons of
wisdom and moderation without profiting somewhat by them. I have been
twice entirely ruined, and yet am consoled by my philosophy. Returning
from America, I saw myself neglected—even repulsed—by my royal
masters, to whom I had consecrated the best years of my life—a
king—princes who have not deigned to extend the hand of friendship to
an old and faithful servant, and who let him grow old in indigence and
want. Well, I am still resigned, and for more than ten years have lived
without complaint, in a state bordering on the extremest misery. But you
know, sir, that man’s strength is not inexhaustible—there is a point
beyond endurance—it is to that point you, sir, have brought me—”
“I, sir? I?”
“You will see, sir. The necessity I was under to contract my desires has
conducted me, little by little, to a modesty of enjoyment which will
astonish you. Our desires increase with fortune; but a wise man has
strength of mind enough to diminish them in inverse ratio to his
misfortunes. Mine, sir, are concentrated upon an object so humble that I
might well believe it beyond the caprice of destiny. The object of which
I speak is the little bench where you are seated—where, since the 17th
of April, you, sir, have come to seat yourself each day, a little
earlier than it was my custom to come out to rest myself. For two years
I have taken a fancy to this spot in the garden. I love that bench—that
shade—those flowers. In summer I come here in the sweet morning hour,
peacefully to enjoy the perfume of these honeysuckles. In autumn—in
winter—the smallest ray of sunshine upon the corner of the garden wall
reflects its heat upon that narrow bench, making it a delightful
resting-place for the worn out frame of an old man. What shall I say?
This sweet resort obtained soon such an empire over me, that I had but
one end—but one desire to gratify—the least sunshine upon the roofs
which my garret overlooks—the least smile of heaven had for me, a poor
old man, more intoxicating charms than ever glance of a mistress to the
most devoted lover. It was a real passion—a love with all its joys and
delicious griefs—a cloudy or a rainy day threw me in despair, and I
felt all the torments of absence from the thing I loved—but was the
morrow beautiful, I made the most brilliant toilet I could imagine, and
ran to my little bench, convinced that I should find its pleasures
increased.
“Is it necessary to tell you now, sir, that since the 17th of April you
have driven me from my paradise, and that you have become my
executioner!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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