Edmund did not look puzzled; he was deciding no knotty question at this
moment. Nor did he look simply unhappy: she knew his expression when in
sorrow and when in physical pain or mere disgust. He looked intensely
preoccupied and very firm. Perhaps, she fancied, he too had a deep sense
of that passing of life, of something akin in the swift movement of the
water passing the yacht and the swift movement of life passing by the
individual man. Was he, perhaps, feeling how life was going for him and
for Rose, and by the simple fact of its passing on while they were
standing passive their lives would be fixed apart?--passing, apart from
what might have been of joy, of peace, of company along the road? There
are moments when, even without the stimulus of passion, human beings
have a sort of guess at the possibilities of helping one another, of
giving strength, and gaining sweetness, that are slipping by. There are
many degrees of regret, between that of ships that pass in the night,
and that of those who have voyaged long together. There are passages of
pleasure sympathy, and passages of sympathy in fight, and passages of
mutual succour, and passages of intercourse when incapacity to help has
in itself revealed the intensity of good-will in the watcher. But
whenever the heart has been fuller than its words, and the will has been
deeper than its actions, there is this beauty of regret. There has been
a wealth of love greater than could be given or received--not the love
of passion, but the love of the little children of the human race for
one another. This regret is too grave to belong to comedy, and too happy
to belong to tragedy. Rose's heart was full with this sorrow, if it be a
real sorrow. These are the sorrows of hearts that are too great for the
occasions of life, whereas the pain is far more common of the hearts
that are not big enough for what life gives them of opportunity.
Rose was oppressed by feelings she could not analyse, a sense of
possibilities of what might have been after these perfect weeks
together. But her feelings were dreamy; she had no sense of concrete
alternative; she did not now--he had been too skilful--expect Edmund to
ask her, nor did she wish him to ask her, to draw quite close to him.
She only felt at the end of this interlude they had spent together a
suspicion of the infinite reach of the soul, and the soul not rebelling
against its bonds, but conscious of them while awaiting freedom.
"Only I discern infinite passion and the pain
Of finite hearts that yearn."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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