As I told George Thario, I am no philistine; I think the Parthenon and
the Taj Mahal are lovely buildings, but I would not care to have an
office in either of them--give me Radio City. I don't mind the highbrow
programs the British Broadcasting Corporation put on; I myself am quite
capable of understanding and enjoying them, but I imagine there are
thousands of housewives who would prefer a good serial to bring romance
into their lives. I don't object to a commercial world in which
competitors go through the formality of pretending to be scrupulously
fair in talking about each others' products, but I must admit I missed
the good old American slapdash advertising which yelled, Buy my
deodorant or youll stink; wash your mouth with my antiseptic or youll
lose your job; brush your teeth with my dentifrice or no one will kiss
you; powder your face with my leadarsenate or youll keep your
maidenhead. I would give a lot of money to hear a singing commercial
once more or watch the neon lights north of Times Square urge me to buy
something for which I have no possible use. Living within your income is
fine, but the world lacks the goods youd have bought on the
installmentplan; getting what you need is sound policy, but how many
lives were lightened by the young men working their way through college,
or the fullerbrushman?
I think there was a subconscious realization of this which came
gradually to the top. In the beginning the almost universal opinion was
that the loss of the aching limb was for the better. I have heard
socalled cultured foreigners discuss the matter in my presence,
doubtless unaware I was an American. No more tourists, they gloated, to
stand with their backs to the Temple of Heaven in Pekin and explain the
superior construction of the Masonic Hall at Cedar Rapids; no more
visitors to the champagne caves at Rheims to inquire where they could
get a shot of real bourbon; no more music lovers at Salzburg or
Glyndebourne to regret audibly the lack of a peppy swingtune; no more
gourmets in Vienna demanding thick steaks, rare and smothered in onions.
But this period of smug selfcongratulation was soon succeeded by a
strange nostalgia which took the form of romanticizing the lost land.
American books were reprinted in vast quantities in the Englishspeaking
nations and translated anew in other countries. American movies were
revived and imitated. Fashionable speech was powdered with what were
conceived to be Yankee expressions and a southern drawl was assiduously
cultivated.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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